November – 2009 – Sexpert Jane Blow - Sex Advice and Education, Porn Reviews, Adult Toys, and more!

Posted on Nov 30, 2009 by JaneBlow — FMK — 1 comment

TIME TO PLAY F**K – MARRY – KILL: Scream Awards Inspired

I don’t know when it was aired originally, but I watched the Scream Awards last night because I had it recorded on my DVR and had nothing else better to do. It was cool to watch True Blood win so many awards, New Moon took home a bunch too as did the new Star Trek and along with Megan Fox and the Transformers crew because the fans voted for the winners. The awards got boring, so I turned them off, but it got me thinking of other horror, sci-fi, fantasy, comic-y, cult classic flix thus inspiring me to post this FMK.

Figure out where all the exits are and don’t run up the stairs! – Time to Play FMK!

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Posted on Nov 26, 2009 by JaneBlow — How To, Jane Says — Comments Off

Avoid Traveling Embarrassment

Before you travel home during the holidays with your sex toys, manly tool arsenal and your bag of kink… I want to help you avoid any embarrassing situations you might encounter.

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Posted on Nov 23, 2009 by JaneBlow — FMK — 2 comments

TIME TO PLAY F**K – MARRY – KILL: GROWING UP

We all have an obsession with child stars growing up and becoming hot, clear proof would be all the count downs till the Olsen Twins were legal. Don’t pretend to not know what I’m taking about. Next come the Celebrities bidding for domain names to make countdowns FOR their children, like the failed attempt at www.SuriCruise.com. We love to see child stars grow up and succeed, but we love to see them EPIC FAIL even more. Today, we’re just going to FMK them!

Grab your Juicey Juice Box (and your shot of Vodka) – Time to Play F M K !!!

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Posted on Nov 19, 2009 by JaneBlow — Reviews, Toys — 3 comments

Leeloo Would Be Proud of Lelo

I’m tired of replacing batteries, charging batteries, worrying if the batteries are going to explode…and the dreaded “I’m about to cum but fear my batteries are dieing” feeling. I’d spend the extra $20 for a rechargeable toy.

Know what else? I’m tired of toys I pay for breaking after a few uses and they don’t come with a warranty. I’d spend the extra $20 for a better quality toy.

Quite frankly, I know what a cock feels like. All of these “realistic” “cyberskin” toys are nice, but I want something different.

If I am, I know you are too.

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Tags: Billy, Bo, Bob, Cadillac, California Exotics, cars, cock ring, Controur Vibe, doc johnson, Elise, Ella, Ferrari, Ford, G-SPot, GiGi, Ina, Iris, Koenigsegg, Leeloo, Lelo, Lily, Liv, Luna Beads, Luxe, Luxury, Male Arsenal, Mia, mini vibe, Mona, Nea, Rechargeable, The Fifth Element, Topco, Volvo, Warranty

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Posted on Nov 16, 2009 by JaneBlow — FMK — 5 comments

TIME TO PLAY F**K – MARRY – KILL: NEW MOON

It is that time again, teens and adults alike getting anxious for something TWILIGHT to come out. Personally, I feel the same way a fellow DAPSer Mike does:

“Only a few more days ’til a mormon zealot serves up another big dish of mind poision and the mindless females of this country lap it up like obedient dogs.”

I wonder if he was trying to be funny because there are a lot more werewolves in New Moon. Eh, either way, I agree. Just another thing to capitalize on teenage awkwardness.

Grab your Glitter and ice cold Dildos – Time to Play F M K !!!

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Posted on Nov 11, 2009 by JaneBlow — How To, Jane Says — 1 comment

Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow.

Before the late 1980′s it was commonplace to be met with Hairy Woman Growler or man’s Teddy Ruffsben Junk. Then little by little bikini lines shaped up, trimmed down, and were waxed off completely into the 1990′s. Porno, models, and society seemingly overnight banned the bush.

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Posted on Nov 10, 2009 by JaneBlow — Guest Posts, Jane Says — Comments Off

BACHELOR’S GUIDE: Winner Winner, Chicken Dinner.

We know this is a loaded topic. “Improving you to be a better bachelor,” and coming from women, sounds like a bunch of nagging. Hopefully, we’ve proven by now we can be “one of the guys”.

This week we are cooking. Are you too broke to go out to eat every weekend? Tired of not closing the deal? Sick of Ramen and take out? This tip will guarantee you saving money (and not just on date nights) and at least get her foot in the door for a few hours.

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Tags: balsamic vinaigrette, breaking down a chicken, cheap date ideas, cooking, date night at home, dicing an onion, learn how to cook, peeling garlic, roasting a chicken, shopping list, two cheese rice and mushrooms

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Posted on Nov 09, 2009 by JaneBlow — Porn & Erotica, Reviews — 2 comments

A List of Free Porno

The internet is for porn, and if anyone tries to tell you different, back hand them… because, ya know where your palms have been. If you’ve ever wanted to see a comprehensive list of the best free porno sites on the internet TODAY is your lucky day!

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Posted on Nov 09, 2009 by JaneBlow — FMK — Comments Off

TIME TO PLAY F**K – MARRY – KILL: DC COMICS

A couple days ago a good friend told me that my favorite local Comic Book Store is having a Grand Opening Party. Yeah, I thought about that too but they offer THIS explanation:

“JOINT GRAND OPENING PARTY FOR COMIC BOOK JONES AND BOUND FOR GLORY TATTOO SHOP!

Yes, I know Comic Book Jones has been open for almost two years now but we actually never had a grand opening party! So, we’re gonna finally get it done and do it right alongside our buddies at Bound For Glory Tattoo. We’ll have tattooed go-go dancers, sideshow freaks and other assorted wackiness and it all takes place down at Cargo Cafe on Bay Street on Friday, November 13th starting at 10:00 PM. We better see all you crazies there! If you need directions or any additional info be sure to shoot us an e-mail or call us at the store.”

Don your Spandex and grab your Capes – Time to Play F M K !!!

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Tags: batman, Black Canary, Bound For Glory Tattoo, Brodie, Cargo Cafe, Catwoman, Comic Book Jones, FemDom, FKM, FMK, Fuck Marry Kill, Green Lantern, Howard Stern, Kryptonite Condom, Mallrats, Step Brothers, Super Woman, superman

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Posted on Nov 05, 2009 by JaneBlow — BDSM, How To, Jane Says — 5 comments

A BDSM & SSC Primer

We’ve received some mail and questions asking about the Kinkier side of sex and questions about BDSM; here is an introduction. Much of the following is fact, a few points are my opinion from direct experience. We welcome all questions and debate.

BDSM is short for Bondage, Dominance and Sadomasochism. Some also feel s/M stands for submissive or slave and Master. Others feel “S” also stands for Switch.

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Tags: anthropomorphize, BDSM, bear, Beauty Trilogy, Bisexual, boi, Bondage, bottom, CHOKE, CSI, D/s, Dom, Domina, Dominance, Dominant, dominatrix, Domme, facebook, fashionista, fetish, furry, gay, girl, GLBT, Gor, humiliation, Kink.com, Kinky, Leather Daddy, Lesbian, Literotica.com, masochist, Master, Mistress, pain, pet, Pineapple, Poodle, Power Exchange, Queer, Rape Play, Red Yellow and Green, S&M, sadist, Sadomasochism, Safe, Safe Word, SAM smart ass masochist, Sane and Consensual, scientology, Secretary, slave, SSC, Sub-Shop.com, subbie, submission, Submissive, Swinger, Swinging, Switch, The Story of O, Top, Topping from the Bottom, Transexual, Transgender, twitter, Vanilla, Vanilla Conversion Project

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Sexpert Jane Blow - Sex Advice and Education, Porn Reviews, Adult Toys, and more!

TIME TO PLAY F**K – MARRY – KILL: Scream Awards Inspired

Avoid Traveling Embarrassment

TIME TO PLAY F**K – MARRY – KILL: GROWING UP

Leeloo Would Be Proud of Lelo

TIME TO PLAY F**K – MARRY – KILL: NEW MOON

“Only a few more days ’til a mormon zealot serves up another big dish of mind poision and the mindless females of this country lap it up like obedient dogs.”

Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow.

BACHELOR’S GUIDE: Winner Winner, Chicken Dinner.

A List of Free Porno

TIME TO PLAY F**K – MARRY – KILL: DC COMICS

A BDSM & SSC Primer

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