BDSM

Erotica: #FuckToyFriday A Lesson in Shibari and Old Guard

“You have to start at the bottom, not the other way around” she told you in conversation, and you’ve found yourself intrigued.  It stuck in your head, why not try leaning BDSM skills from the ground up, it doesn’t make you any less of a man…right?

You’re at Her doorstep, how bad could it be? You straighten your clothes, a deep breath and ring the bell; first day of school.  “C’mon in, how’re you? Ready to play with some rope today? Then learn how to adjust a bondage spanking horse?”  She seems nice… in a predator posing as a houseplant kind of way.

She gets you comfortable, you’re learning different knots and wrap styles, you’re practicing on her after she ties you.  First was a simple rope cuff on you a few times, and she shows you how to knot without being too tight; you flex in the bonds, feels weird.  She made two loops for your wrists, wrapped them up your wrists, and the loose ends were woven back through to secure them.  She tells you the importance of wrapping the center to make the bond so the subbie can’t get out.

You try to do the same, but it looks sloppy, she laughs and instructs by “chinning” at you to move stuff because she is bound.  At least the second try looked better than the first.  You don’t like the laughing too much, you’re having a good time but you can tell that little laugh could turn mocking. But you brush it off, thinking of how you could turn the tables on her… though She could probably hang you faster & tighter, so you go back to learning mode; over, under, tug, tighten… and ankle cuff wrap is much like the wrists.  At least she let me tie myself, something about how trustworthy She is and how quick She is a little unsetteling.  Now a chest harness.

She gets a mirror for this one, this way you can see behind you as she moves fluidly, practiced, and disciplined around you.  The rope is tight, heavy, compressing but beautiful, you admit, she has skills to be learned.  She first put the rope over your shoulders like a huge chain necklace and crossed the front so the loop was in the middle of your body. Walking around you she takes the ends and crosses them and pulls them through the front so that the harness is “on” you.  She then weaves the rope to go over these same lines, making twists and knots to make it attractive.  It seems to take forever and minutes at the same time.  You love to watch her work, but you’re still not comfortable being bound, it smells weird, and why is it so tight? Wait did she go over or under that last knot?

As if on cue, “Pay attention, I’m only showing you twice, then you have to show me what you learned…” Fuuuck, you decide under, what is she going to do anyway?

She undoes the chest harness, your turn. “Don’t fuck up, I might make you pay for it so you’ll remember mistakes” she laughs.  Oh, how, tie my thumbs together? Sure… Miss. You laugh inwardly, and hope she isn’t serious, how could you take her serious at her height, she is toss-able, how is she Dom? excuse you, Domme.

You’ve succeeded? You’re not sure, harness is on, it is sloppy, but she doesn’t approve or disapprove, just says “Do it again.”  Well… that was cold, you clearly don’t like it and she knows it.  On it goes, 3 more different wraps, corset bondage, and a half suspension. Back and forth, just a little laugh and “Do it again”.  Then she has you try all the knots on her from the beginning wrist cuff.  The rope feels good in your hands, and you surely have more confidence than when you first walked in.

You’re both glad and frustrated, “Well, you did ok for a beginner, but you often crossed over instead of under, and you must learn to work neater.  Shibari isn’t just bondage, it should be beautiful.  The time you spend getting them IN the bondage should add to your scene and help take your subbie into sub space.  Next on agenda is the bondage spanking horse.  It takes quite a bit of set up, but once a subbie is in it, there’s no squirming away from manipulations.”

Oh good! Finally, a machine to work, Men and machines always go together, you follow her into another room.

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Erotica: #FuckToyFriday It’s Been Awhile Since You’ve Submitted to a Woman

You’ve come to me because it has been a while since you have been able to sub.  We’ve talked about the things you have missed about being submissive… are you ready?

There is a chair, a small pillow, yards of rope and a table with stuff you can’t quite see; “Stand by the chair, take off your clothes.” I patiently watch, leaning against the table in a tight leather corset, vinyl pants and red stilettos. You carefully fold your clothes, and a pleased smirk pulls at my Ferrari red lips, “I see you have done this before…don’t forget your socks.”  I walk around you inspecting, trailing a short crop from your ankle, up leg, over hips, across back to shoulder. “Yes, this will be fun… your body pleases me.  Today is for me,” the crop taps your semi hard cock lightly …”not you.”

I take your clothing to the table, then place the pillow on the floor, “Kneel for me please, hold your arms up and out”, you now look like you’re a kneeling “T”, palms down.  Taking a length of hemp rope, draping it over my arm, forming a loop, I stand behind you and drag it from your ass to your neck letting you feel how rough the rope feels on your naked body, across your shoulders and left arm, I walk to stand in front of your face.  My feet as wide as your knees are, my sex in your face, you can smell leather and pussy, I notice you inhale deeply, so I stand so that your nose is touching the zipper of my pants.  I’m still dragging the rope across your body, chest, abs, cock, and up to your chin.  I step away from your face after a few minutes, moving to have my sex at your right fingertips, I loop the rope around your wrist to start making a wrist restraint. Rope wrapping around your arm, sliding against your skin, pulling it tightly to bind you, and against itself to knot you in securely. The rope is around your forearm in a wrap/cuff binding; I notice you flexing and fisting your fingers, testing. “Good…  get comfortable, the longer you are bound, the happier you will make me”.

Using the rope, I pull your arm behind your back,  crossing your face again, heels taping wood floor, I bind your other arm, then both together at the small of your back carefully. Admiring my work, I take more rope and start a chest harness… over your shoulders, around your back, making an X braiding the shoulders, and front to create excess as handle loop knots, nice and neat… nice and tight – tugging as I go.  I know you like the process, detail and the time spent being more bound by the minute.  The rope smells earthy, and it reminds you of how naked you are… and how very good this feels for you.  You relax into the rope, begin to let yourself go.  “Very good,” my voice pulls you back from your thoughts, I tug forward on the bonds quickly, roughly, trying to make you lose balance.  Dragging my nails up your arm, tugging again but backwards, then once more to the side but you’ve squared off and sunk into position.

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Dear Jane: I’m Not Into Whips & Chains; How Do I Tell Her?

Dear Jane, <– Don’t be shy, ask me anything, you’re completely anonymous!

What’s a nice way of telling a girl that you are not into the whips and chains stuff.

I like this question a lot.  I so often get the reverse of this question that I’m almost tired of answering it.  The reverse, if you’re wondering, are people who ask me how to tell a partner they enjoy rougher sex or play.  They enjoy being kinky and don’t know how to bring it up to their partner.

The easy answer to this question is to talk with them and say you aren’t interested, but how do you say that nicely (as in, not have them feel rejected or give the impression you’re calling them weird) without sounding like a wimp?

Thankfully, since S&M is so mainstream… thanks Rihanna for bringing it up, yet again.  She is only on the long line which includes (but isn’t limited to) Madonna, CSI, Pulp Fiction, Nine Inch Nails, Anne Rice, Nickleback, Secretary, Mr. & Mrs. Smith, Rammstein, Christina Aguilera, and even Desperate Housewives.  It isn’t like you don’t know what it is or could entail and if you like it or not.

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Erotica: #FuckToyFriday A Mirror, and a Strap On.

SpareParts Joque Harness

You know my strapon it isn’t real but when I place a mirror next to your body and you see yourself… you realize what a cock sucking slut you are, then you moan around my fake cock.

Amazing what a little perspective can do to a BJ; in the mirror you see saliva drip off my cock and pool next to ur pussy juice.

“You’re doing such a good job wetting my cock for your ass, ” so I reward you by lifting your chin and making you watch yourself gag and gurgle around my cock.  This sensless piece of “meat” in your mouth, and yet you’ve been tricked into thinking it is real.  You’ve said, “oh, if you only had a cock…” but I still say I could fuck you good regardless.

I’d fuck you senseless but my cock needs to be in your throat, I look down into your eyes and slowly ease my cock further down into your throat… your eyes tear, and my now wet hands are cradling your face.  Holding tight onto your jawline, easing you further into my lap.

“Feel my cock fill your throat slut?”  One eye in the mirror, your make-up beginning to run, spit spills from your mouth.

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Dear Jane: How Do I Tell My Partner I Want to Be Their Slave?

Dear Jane, <– Ask me a question, I’ll answer it.  FS is an anonymous site that allows you to ask anything you’d like, and have no way to know it was you.

This pic will make sense after the cut, promise.

Jane, how do I subtly tell my boyfriend I want to be treated like a slave? Not totally, but it’s just a hidden fantasy of mine. You know, to be dominated, told what to do or else face punishment. Though it’s my first time wanting this kinda thing…

When I read this, I see key words which trigger other words in my mind.

Slave → Ownership

Dominated → Control

Or Else → Consequences
When you break down what you want into less “alarming” words, or words that aren’t so sexual, it might make it easier for you to express what you want.  I wish I knew if your boyfriend was more vanilla than you are.  Or you just don’t know how to bring up something new because you’re embarrassed.

IF he is more vanilla than you are THEN →

(might be a NSFW pic after the cut)

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Sexlopedia: Edge Play

What do you think Edge Play is?

Think about it.

Recently Oh Megan went to speak at the Rutgers Sex Ed Discussion Panel (I think. Correct me if I’m wrong… she travels so much, I can’t keep track she is so awesome) and while she was there she realized that people and sex educators differed in what the definition of Edge Play was.

It ended up being not quite what they thought.  Whether they had an “educated guess” or it is the “word on the street,” in my opinion, it was almost cute in comparison to what it actually is.

Hint: Map of Human Sexuality and Taboo.

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I Like a Good Flogging, What’s Wrong With Me?

Hey there everyone out in blogger land, I’m Dr.Slick. I joined the Jane Blow all star team of writers after reading and becoming a fan of not only the writing but the idea behind a collaborative effort of sex positive people opening up and answering questions for those in search of kinky enlightenment. I’m not really a doctor, yet. I’m a second year medical student from NYC. I encourage anyone who has a medically related question about sex to send me an email or twitter comment and I’ll do my best to answer it here.

Now for my first topic I decided to pick a common question, but one not many people have the courage to ask their doctor due to shame and embarrassment. “Does being a sadist or masochist mean something is mentally wrong with me?”

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Jane Says: Don’t Believe the Hype, Tied Supine & 69ing.

I was scrolling through twitter on my phone when I came across this statement:

"Any time I see an image of someone cuffed or tied sitting spread eagle at a headboard, I think Meh. Not a useful position at all," made by @Saynine

He followed it up with, "It is sort of like 69. A lot of hype, not really useful."

I quickly agreed, and after some back and forth, I decided to write a post about it.

Think about it.  If someone is on their back (supine), on the bed like that, what do you actually have access to?  Where do you actually fit?   You have chest, face, feet, and belly.

Which I suppose is good if…

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Sexlopedia: Leather Bottom

I don’t know how popular this term is.  I’ll mention it in BDSM circles and I’ll get a funny look from both the younger and the older crowd.  The term is pretty self explaintory, so people who haven’t heard it get the meaning quickly especially in the context.  I am 100% sure I didn’t make up the term, and I don’t think it is a “Vermont thing” BUT it is a term related to Impact Play… spankings, floggings, etc.  Usually the older crowd, if they aren’t novices, get it immediately.  Maybe it is archaic like Old Guard is? Who knows. I don’t.

Ass pic borrowed from www.MyBigJunk.com – No asses were hurt in the writing of this post (unfortunately).

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Sexlopedia: SDS

SDS is a tool to prove a point, SDS is usually liked by Leather Bottoms to a degree, and I dislike SDS.  It is often a mistake made by novice, but I am here to help!

SDS stands for “Same Damn Spot”.

Why is SDS bad?

Imagine being punched in the balls. Twice. In a row.

Ok, it isn’t THAT extreme… but you get the point.

How can you use SDS to your advantage?

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