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Posted on Oct 26, 2010 by — Lubes & Lotions, Reviews — Comments Off

Review: Kama Sutra Love Liquid Warming Cinnamon

If you’re paying attention, you’ll know that I am going to try to do as many toy reviews as I can till National Sex Toy Day!  It might get a little crazy, but it is one of the few ways I can help raise awareness for the awesome event that MyPleasure has sponsored.  They’re even giving away Free Sex Toys for the event.  I’m all for a free sex toy, free is for me.

This lube came to me via a really cool rep from Kama Sutra.  I met him at the NJ ECN Warehouse Show; we shared a lovely ride to the harbor, had a great conversation and he decided to give me one of everything the next day.  It was great, thanks!

I blindly stuck my hand into the Kama Sutra goodie bag and the first thing I grabbed was the Love Liquid in Warming Cinnamon; and its a good thing too, I had an Invisi-Vibe in my other hand that needed lube.  Before I put it anywhere near my vag I did my standard hand test.  A few drops on one hand, and it gets rubbed with the other till it gets snotty, sticky, white, foamy, or any other weird thing that a bad lube can do.

It took a while but it happened, it was bound to happen, it is a water based lubricant. After a minute it got cloudy and tacky… this usually isn’t a good sign.  I can say it didn’t get too hot, and it gets warmer when I blew on it.

Ingredients: Water, Glycerine, Propylene Glycol, Hydroxy Ethylcellose, Tetrasodium EDA, Citric Acid, Sodium Benzoate, Flavor, Aroma.

AKA – the usual suspects.  Nothing new or out of place from a lube company, I am a little sad that a company in business for what, 40 years? Would change the formula a bit more than they have instead of concentrate so much time on the bottles and packaging.  I do like the oval shape to the bottle, it means it wont roll around in my drawer, if it does fall, it’ll stay in one place.

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Posted on Oct 07, 2010 by — Lubes & Lotions, Reviews — 1 comment

Review: ON Natural Oil For Her by Sensuva

ON just hit markets a few weeks ago and I’ve had the privilege to get a sample bottle directly from the awesome J.W at Sensuva who happened to be traveling with the even awesomer G.W from The S.T.O.R.E Program.

When I ordered the arousal oil, I immedately read the package.  They boast no parabens, no harsh preservatives, no L-Arginine, no menthols, no perfumes, no added flavors just for flavor’s sake.

Other than Sliquid’s Organic O Gel, there aren’t many arousal agents that can function and be so pure; this ON seems to be it’s competition.  Sliquid does use Menthol & Peppermint Oil though, which means it will end up having a cooling effect.

ON contains Sweet Almond Oil, Cinnamonum Cassia, Vitamin E, Rosemary Extract and Phenoxyethanol, and Ethylehxyglycerin.

So, with further investigation, Sensuva is being a little sneaky – no “parabens” but they used replacements that are being used in the skin care market – thanks for your consideration with your oil and our vaginas?  Also, upon looking at ingredients; the Cinn. Cassia? Thats the stuff that makes the warming/burning sensation in the more “natural” lubes, lotions, and chewing gum.

J.W had me place two drops on my finger, and then rub it on my tongue.  I know this routine, I do this at toy parties when the ladies are too shy to take some pre-measured sample pack to the bathroom to test it out.  Tingle creams on the lip, vibes touched to the ear or nose for a more proper comparison than holding it in your hand.

As I was rubbing it in, he tells me they tell people (usually men) that it feels like a weak 9volt battery being tested on your tongue.  I admit, I couldn’t hold back my “WTF” face.  I’ve spent time as a guitarist’s girlfriend, I’ve touched a 9volt to my tongue, it isn’t a pleasant sensation.

After the active ingredients kicked in, I understood what he was talking about.  It was like Pop Rocks without the rocks along with a warming sensation, plus it sorta tasted like I bit into a rosemary sprig.  Ok, fine, I’ll take it home to see how my vagina likes it…

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Posted on Jun 24, 2010 by — Lubes & Lotions, Reviews — Comments Off

Review: Goodhead (mint)

Goodhead is sold at every xxx store I’ve ever been in, and has been featured at every home toy party I have ever been to (or done myself) with good reason!  It can easily be said that it is the number one selling flavored oral sex gel.  Doc Johnson is considered one of the founding adult novelty companies and has lasted the test of time, due to standing on the backs of products like this one.

Facts:

  • Comes in 5 flavors: Mint, Cinnamon, Cherry, Strawberry and Passion Fruit.
  • Mint has an extra “cooling” effect because of the Menthol ingredient in it.
  • Cinnamon has an extra “warming” effect.
  • Ingredients (mint): DI Water, Clycerin, Algin, Acesulfame K, Artifical Flavor, Propylene Glycol, Diazolidinyl Urea, Methylparaben, Propylparaben, FD&C Blue #1, FD&C Yellow #5.
  • Gently numbs your throat to reduce gag reflex.
  • Wont break your bank in price, most places sell this product for under $15 for a 4oz tube.
  • Every 4oz bottle comes with a fun ‘oral sex’ information scroll that includes fun facts about “gobbling”.

I’ve tried the other flavors of Goodhead, and mint is my favorite.  The others are fruity and fun, the cinnamon even warms a little, but I like the extra cooling effect I get from using the mint flavor.

It is sort of like that winterfresh mint toothpaste feeling; even though I’m giving head, it smells like I’ve brushed my teeth.  I personally have no problem with the way my partner tastes, but if on occasion you get someone with funky spunk Goodhead can help mask that grossness.

When showing people this product, occasionally I’ll meet a person who says it tastes like medicine (usually I get this reaction to cherry) but that person is 1 out of 100, most others feel it tastes like Jell-O.

Fun:

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Posted on Jun 11, 2010 by — Lubes & Lotions, Reviews — Comments Off

Review: Cleopatra’s Secret (is Between My Legs)

A recommended, innocuous white jar sits on my computer desk, its definition similar to that of an under-eye wrinkle creme. A green label wraps around the front, Cleopatra’s Secret Creme, in simple gold cursive. I twist open the lid and the contents are a a soft green dense lotion that when is raised to my nose and inhaled, reminds me of speaking intimately to someone with a mouth compacted of menthol cough suppressants.

I flip around the jar for instructions, finding only one sentence proclaiming one will “experience waves of pleasure and delight when lovingly applied to the clitoris.” No warnings, no other directions, just certainty that this product will be enjoyed.

Facts:

  • Ingredients: Sunflower Oil, Glycerol Monosterate, Stearic Acid, Sorbitol, Cetyl Alcohol, Sodium Bensoate, Potassium Sorbate, Propylparaben, FD&C Colors, Flavors.
  • L-Arginine free / Petro-chemicals free
  • Edible
  • Made by Classic Erotica

Fun:

I rub a generous amount on…

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Posted on Jun 03, 2010 by — Lubes & Lotions, Reviews — Comments Off

Review: Climax Fruit Bomb Lubricant

Flavored lubricants have a really bad reputation.  They usually taste nasty – like melted chapstick or worse.  They get sticky, and slimey -ick.  I long ago gave up on flavored lubes for personal use.  Nothing was ever good enough… but then I started doing oral workshops and we needed a flavored lube to stand behind.  The search was ON again, in full force.  After fingertip after fingertip if disgusting lubes – I came across this one!

Climax Fruit Bomb Strawberry Fields – wow.  Seriously, just wow. The whole line is AMAZING.  There is also Chery Cola, Blue Razzberry, Coco Pineapple, Kiwi Lime and Orange Dreamcicle.

Facts:

  • 4 fl. oz. (118 ml) bottle
  • A delightfully fresh burst of juicy strawberry flavor in a lubricant
  • Pump top bottle of edible, spreadable fun
  • Gorgeous, discreet design can sit on any nightstand
  • Made in USA

Fun:

First, it passed my finger test.  I put a drop of lube in the palm of my hand and rub it till it gets sticky or snotty – this one didn’t!  It stayed slick for an abnormally long time.  It made me check to see if it was silicone based; nope, water based!  I was shocked, normal flavored lubes get gross almost immediately.  Next I tasted it.

I swear to you, it tastes like an actual factual strawberry.  Off the vine.  Not that crappy commercial sucky strawberry “flavored” taste.  No, it TASTES like an actual strawberry.  My brain was waiting to come into contact with a seed it was so real tasting.  Drum-roll please .. … … … … and it has no sucky chapstick icky after taste!!!

Sold, I was SOLD right then and there – I HAD to open up the other bottles to taste them.  The razzberry was a ripe raspberry, the orange dreamcicle tastes like icecream, coco pineapple tastes like the best pinacolada you’ve ever had… and before I start to sound like the kids licking wallpaper at the Wonka Factory… you get the point.

My partner thought the lube tasted great (and he HATES flavored lube), and it didn’t get sticky on us.  It was safe to use with all my toys and the ladies and gents at my workshops rave about Climax Fruit Bombs.  Clients come back month after month to get their favorite flavor or try something new.  I proudly put these lubricants on my tester shelf and let people sample them – after one lick – they are smitten.

Conclusion:

Since Climax bombs have opened up my mind to trying flavored lubes again, I’ve been retrying and ordering new products – but as far as price, amount you get in the bottle and flavor – the average Jack and Jane will LOVE this product!

It was love at first swipe, but the brand snobs will say it is the best in its price range.

Rating: + + + + +

Topco Sales Sex Toy Authorized Reviewer

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Posted on May 20, 2010 by — Lubes & Lotions, Reviews — Comments Off

Review: Earthly Body

There are many companies out there trying to ride the HEMP wave, but Earthly Body is succeeding with flying colors (smoke signals?) if you ask me.  They are even on their way to help prevent the spread of HPV.

Earthly Body is recognized by PETA as one of their “Good Guys” because their entire line is vegan safe.  Yep, that’s right, no vegans were harmed in the making of these products (sorry, couldn’t help myself).  They are also featured in Nails, Allure, Women’s World magazines.

No you cannot get high from using these products, but you will get to enjoy the omega 3 fatty acids found in natural hemp oil conditioning your skin and sex life.

I was recently at an East Coast News (ECN) seminar in NJ and Earthly Body was there showing off for the crowd.  It was just like attending a Toy Party for professionals.  Products were passed around and we got to hear the benefits, and touch, rub and smell the products.   Glow Industries and DonWands have teamed up with this company (for about 4 years now), and that was where I was first introduced; I have to say that Earthly Body does an awesome job with their natural fun products.

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Posted on May 13, 2010 by — Lubes & Lotions, Reviews — Comments Off

Review: Wet Synergy

Complex lubricants give you the best of both worlds.  You get the safety and gel like texture from the water base they are made of and the long lasting silky feeling from the silicone mixed in.

But which one should you try first?

Lucky for you, this concept for lubricant isn’t spankin’ new and you have a few to choose from.  One (or two) of which is Wet Synergy.  Synergy just hit the market this month, and I’m proud to say I got my curious little hands on it already!  Special thanks to @WetTogether!!

Facts:

  • Water Based
  • Hypoallergenic
  • pH Balanced
  • Latex Friendly
  • Silky Smooth
  • Use for Sex, Masturbation or Massage
  • Longer lasting
  • +Cool formula gets cold

Fun:

Getting packages with my name on them from these companies, is like a special kind of christmas/birthday/just because you’re awesome day all in one. I have to admit that I still get excited when I expect something new.  When this little box came the wrapping quickly gave way to my Doc Johnson box cutter….

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Posted on May 06, 2010 by — Lubes & Lotions, Reviews — Comments Off

Review: FleshLube

If you have a Fleshlight, then you need Fleshlube.

Instead of my Stunt Cock “Mikey”, I’m going to be writing this one because I’ve used and have seen this trio in action.

Facts:

  • Each are Water Based
  • Made medically, bodily, toy safe
  • Each are technically/designed for use with a Fleshlight
  • One of them is a regular water based, no frills lube – Water
  • One of them warms – Fire
  • The last of them gets cool -Ice

“Mikey” says out of all of the lubricants he tried out with the Fleshlights he owns, these are the best.  We aren’t being paid by Fleshlight, they didn’t ask us to write up this review.  It is just fact.  Fleshlight website also sells/recommends Astroglide, ID Glide, and Gun Oil – each one better than the next – but skip them, take our word on it, and use the Fleshlube.

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Posted on Apr 29, 2010 by — Lubes & Lotions, Reviews — Comments Off

Review: Wet Together Ultimate

@WetTogether sent me Together Ultimate to review for them, and I’m excited to report back to you!

The XXX industry seems to have taken the smart turn of marketing for couples just as strongly as they market products for the genders separately.  This smartly packaged product is no exception.  First off, it is gold, people like seeing gold.  The picture is tasteful, easy to read and to the point of what the products do.

I really dislike looking for the little key words on lubricant bottles to figure out what it does especially if it isn’t color coded either.  Usually a red lube bottle, means it warms; but not always.  Together Ultimate puts everything important in a bold font.  One pleasure gel for her, one enhancement for him. Nice and easy, but you do have to decode “pleasure” and “enhancement” a teeny bit.  Allow me to explain.

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Posted on Apr 22, 2010 by — Lubes & Lotions, Reviews — Comments Off

Review: Elbow Grease Original Cream Lube

My “Stunt Cocks” love their job.

My guys don’t star in porno, they test products for me and give me a full report.  I guess I should collectively call them “Mikey” instead.  You remember the Life Cereal Commercial where the kids wouldn’t try the cereal and they gave it to Mikey who ended up liking the cereal.

Recently Elbow Grease Lubricants and I were chatting on Twitter, and they ended up sending me a few samples for my stunt cock Mikey to try out.  After I dug him out of masturbation heaven, this is what he had to say about one of the oldest lubricant companies out there.

Jane threw me in mostly blind to this one, made me do my research and learn the product.  Since mine came in a little sample pouch there wasn’t much info to start with.  She told me it was great to jerk off with, and not to use the whole packet in one session.

Facts:

  • Their website says THIS one is the lube that started it all for the company back in 1979.
  • Mineral oil based thick cream lubricant.
  • Safe, long-lasting premium lubricant.
  • Should only be used with polyurethane condoms and should not be used with latex.

Fun:

She didn’t tell me the gay community also loves this product for anal sex.  That I figured out on my own with some googling -  much to my girlfriend’s delight.  I can understand why.

I opened up some vids on pornhub.com so I wouldn’t get this stuff all over the place.  I’ve never used creams, so I didn’t know what to expect.  Opening the packet was easy, I hate packets I can’t open, especially in the bedroom.  You lose the moment if you’re fumbling.

I used a little less than a third of the packet, put some on my cock and some on my hand and started stroking.  It started out as a cream which was cool because it doesn’t immediately make a mess.  No drop cloth needed for this lube, it stays where you want it.

After a few minutes it melted.  Its the only way to describe it.  It went from cream, to, liquid butter sorta.  I nearly came right then because it was a surprise and felt really great.  I made it through a few videos and had a good time with this stuff.

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