Attending a Nina Hartley Workshop !!

I was sitting at work one day, putting prices on dildos and ordering movies when the phone rang (as it does).  I knew who it was just by looking at the number; it was my favorite movie distributor Tracy Sales.  She calls me special for new releases, most of her other customers get a lousy email, needles to say Jane Blow is loved.  We do the special orders:

“Yes, sure I’ll take 4 copies of Big White Asses #7, but not the Jules Jordan Semen Sippers #19.”  I like doing orders when clients are around, the funny looks are the best.  Tracy also tells me about all the porn stars coming through.  She has ties with Alexis Texas, Belladonna and Jesse Jane to name a few.  Usually my bosses wave off the store signing because we don’t have enough time to advertise and I don’t usually go because I’m working.  This time around she had a special treat for me.

“Alright, so that was the order, and now I can tell you about the special treat I have for you, it is totally up your alley”

“ha, thats what she said!  Whats up Tracy, a good deal on some new swag?”

“Nope! Better!”

“Better than free swag?  What is it?”

“How would you like to meet… … Nina Hartley?!”

“Holy shit!? THE Nina Hartley?  My idol, Nina Hartley.  Who I strive to be like, Nina Hartley?  The greatest (imo) sex educator Nina Hartley???!!!!”

“Yes!  Next week, shes going to be at The Pleasure Chest doing a few workshops, can you go?”

“For Nina? Of Course I can go!!! I’d even take off if I have to!”


Which luckily, I didn’t have to.  Got my cake and ate it too!  I waited all week, it felt like a month!

Nina Hartley started as a dancer and moved her way up to pornography, and blossomed into the fabulous educator sex positive feminist that she is today.  She is most famous for her appearances on HBO’s Real Sex and for her How To Guides which are being released by Adam & Eve.  She is an old school classic and anyone who is anyone knows her – or so I thought.  Being so proud and excited that I was going to meet one of my all time idols in the sex industry I told EVERYONE.  To my surprise I got this from more than a few of my peers:


What you do mean you don’t know who Nina Hartley is??!!  Are you kidding me people?  She was big deal before Jenna Jameson and you don’t know who Nina is?  Crazy.  But I suppose, if you all knew everything, I’d be out of a job. haha.


The first evening the workshop was about BDSM.  She covered what Power Exchange is (dynamic of giving up power to your partner and trusting that they wont hurt you or do anything you don’t want), what the role of playing the Dominant or Submissive means, how to properly spank someone with your hand or an implement like a belt or flogger.  She warns against letting the object wrap around the person’s butt because that could hurt far too much – also, you miss your target area which is not fun at all.  You don’t want to do any lasting damage to your partner, so practice and aim for the right spot.  We will more deeply cover this in another post.


She talked for a long time on how communication is important, and to not be ashamed of your desires.  Be upfront with the things you enjoy especially in the bedroom.  Nina warned that an unhealthy sexual relationship is like a mentally abusive relationship.  Introduce what you want softly to your partner, and if they recoil to your idea try to work it out instead of ignoring a desire that you have.  Nina was in a marriage that she left by jumping out a window with her suitcases into a rose bush, she often tells people to get out of a damaging suppressing relationship before something like that happens to them.


During the workshop she opened the floor to questions and there were some really good answers.  Nina was a little long winded, but she covered every angle in which the question could have been coming from.  Like Nina Hartley, I have had to answer any question I’ve gotten far more broadly because too many times do people ask a question but are ashamed to ask what they REALLY WANT.  People often take a backwards or sideways approach to trying to find out what they want to know. PLEASE STOP DOING THAT!


One of the questions Nina received was from a female who wanted to know how to asked to get spanked, she felt weird asking for it since domestic violence isn’t a good thing at all and doesn’t want to give off the wrong message to her new partner.

Nina said ask for it, straight out, heat of the moment.  She also said try to spank yourself, or to place his hands but then bring it up afterward during pillow talk.  “You didn’t think that was weird did you?  Sometimes during awesome sex I need a good spank.”  Keep communication open and fun, it is really key to an awesome sex life and relationship.
Jane Blow can only agree!  So if you don’t believe us, ask Nina Hartley!


After she did a signing, picture taking and I couldn’t believe how similar her and I (Jackie) are.  People are drawn to her sexually and she is so awesome and sexually confident, it exudes from her every pore.  We have the same views (I’m guessing it comes from being educated, this happens a lot if you’re sexually educated) on relationships, being bi-sexual was another strong point we had.  She loves BDSM, as do I and even said it was great that I revived a Munch Group in VT.  Nina asked me a bunch of questions about my boobs, and felt me up for a bit.  She is the coolest!  I’m pretty sure we have the same shoe size, which is interesting (I have small feet, and can never borrow from a friend).  We even do the same hand gestures when we get excited. But the best thing ever, is that she said she was a Pisces.  Which I am too, so I asked her what her birthday was and it is March 11th!  THE SAME AS MINE.


When we left, I was walking on a cloud and then Tracy informs me that Nina doesn’t normally have hour long conversations with just anyone.  I was totally in her cross hairs.  Maybe I should have taken the hint after she told me to stop by her house if I was ever in the area and that I must roleplay a good 12 year old. I guess I was too deep in fan girl space to realize more than her hands on my boob and that I was talking to THE NINA HARTLEY!


Am I blushing? Is it the lights? I don’t care, Nina INSISTED on taking this picture!!

I went back the next night to her Group, Swinger, Poly relationship workshop (not because I’m a newbie, but because I was a moth to light- couldn’t help myself) and she included me since I was an educator too.  People attending the workshop were asking me questions about products in the store instead of the normal clerks who work there. MY APOLOGIES TO THE PLEASURE CHEST, I HAVE TROUBLE TURNING JANE BLOW OFF NO MATTER WHERE I AM!  In all fairness, I made them some great sales that night!


Nina @ The Pleasure Chest, NYC.

The main theme of entering into the Poly world is communication, and having clear lines for rules.  You don’t want to offend the one you love or cheat.  Cheating in a poly relationship is different from a regular relationship rules.  Instead of cheating = you are with someone else ; cheating becomes breaking any of the rules.  She also suggested that if your threesome decides to stay overnight to let them sleep on the outside instead of the middle just in case they need to sneak off.

I reluctantly left after the show was over, but I got a few autographs and her personal email address, so my new BBFL Nina Hartley and I can keep in touch!


So… there you have it people.  Jane Blow is officially 30 steps closer to becoming the next big name in the sex industry!


<3 Jane

Share your thoughts

  • Daye

    that signed picture is AWESOME!

  • JaneBlow

    I’m going to hang it in the DAPS office! :)

  •, Sean – MoonDoggie82

    She kinda looks like Iggy Pop with boobs.

  • CondomElite

    Great job! Nice writing! Love the picture! take me with you next time, Ppplease!

  • BigMeanie

    To show my age, I have a VHS tape of her before the breast implants. It’s an all girl 3-way. Let me know if you’d like to watch it with me, Jane. ;-)