Jane Says: Gag Me With A Spoon

Valspeak aside, we’re discussing The Gag Reflex!

Gagging is USUALLY associated with Deep Throating, but not always – for those who find brushing their teeth a difficult task – I bet you have trouble giving head too?  Stupid Pharyngeal Reflex.

Deep Throat…Before it was a famous porn title, and before you freak if you can’t do it right away – I will tell you that it isn’t necessary for an awesome Blow Job experience. So go home and tell him that pornography isn’t illustrating how many women cannot deep throat, and don’t like anal sex or huge toys jammed into their Vajay. (Sorry guys, you still love me, right?)

Not everyone is going to be able to control their gag reflex, in all honesty almost no one can control it right from the get-go. Gagging is a natural reaction, it is what your body does to keep you from choking; don’t be embarrassed by gagging.

The most important thing about deep throating is control. Being in control is your best asset in the situation, without control an over excited guy; he can thrust while you are not ready and damage your throat or vocal chords.  For your own safety I’m going to translate what you see in porn – and what they are actually doing.


Have him start out soft, so you can let him grow in your mouth.  This helps you get accustomed to his size slowly.

Breathe out as he pushes into you; breathe in as he pulls out.
A Porn Star holds her breath and the guy goes wild with her.  What you don’t know, or see is a little tap out move they do.  The women hold their breath and when they need to come up for air they tap a leg or have a certain safety move.

The best way to get past a gag reflex is to start SLOW! Use a good amount of lube, or saliva and slowly push each inch of his penis into your throat.  From there you control the pace and practice your breathing, keep going as you get accustomed to each inch. If you feel the gag you can back up a little bit and try again.

Another Porn Star move is when the women have a small gag reflex to get past – they swallow.  They pretend they have food in their mouth…and give a little swallow.  This move pushes him back further and tricks your body into thinking that there is nothing in your throat.  After you get past the gag reflex it should be smooth sailing.

Be careful to know your limits and don’t be afraid of the new sensations you will feel. (Like your throat expanding.)

You can use a throat numbing spray to start out – but I prefer the “mind over matter; relax” approach.  Gagging and pain are your body’s way of saying “WHAT THE FUCK?! Slow down!” Not being able to feel, could cause damage.

If your partner is helping you, or getting over excited give his thigh a pinch; since you can’t really SAY “STOP” it can be your “safe word”.

I’ve once heard that deep throating in the wrong position is like trying to put a pencil down ad elbow pipe.  If you are not in the right position – it won’t work.  The right positions are ones that undo the bend in your throat.

Normally, our necks and heads are in a “7” position, there is an obvious bend in it.  Dicks are straight (for the most part) so we have to accommodate that.  These positions open up the 7 into a more 7 o’clock position.

1.  Sixty-Eight – You do him, and he owes you one.  Get into the 69 position, the angle at which you are both in, will aid in deep throating.  It should be difficult for him to reach you without many pillows and contortion if you are doing it right – thus it not being a 69.

2.  Cliff Hanger – Put your head over the side of the bed, and he moves in and out of your mouth. *Added bonus, men are egotistical, they’ll love seeing their dick go down your throat*

3.  The Swallow – Kneel, and hover your body over your ankles. You should have to look upwards at his penis; neck should be extended, and gripping his penis angled down.  This position un-crooks your neck again.  Open wide like a baby birdie.

4.  The Old-fashioned – He is lying on the bed with you between his legs. It’s comfortable for both and easy to maneuver *another added bonus is that this position works great for men who tend to get a bit over zealous, for men that tend to thrust this is the best way to keep them in line and make sure that you don’t get hurt in the process.

I could talk head all day honestly, and since so many of you want to know “how to tips” – we’ve created a workshop for Blow Jobs!  So, sadly, the post ends here BUT I fully encourage you to take a Jane Blow workshop!

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  • Chanel Covington

    if i may comment, after having "tested" each of those positions, my fave still remains at #2…the cliff hanger! thank you Jane!