They always say it’s important to find humor in the bad stuff that happens to us, so I assume that’s why I find humor in a man’s sixth sense. A.K.A knowing when a female gets dumped; the ex can smell the departure of a failed attempt to move on, and will swoop in to re-piss on his, “territory.” To make matters worse, I have just noticed that I keep three men in an odd rotation – likely because the idea of letting someone new see me naked petrifies me.
Just got dumped? Don’t be a crabby ass, call your ex!
After the smoke cleared from the initial blow to my heart/ego last night, I thought to myself, “Fuck you, GUY who I have given way too many chances. Enough so, that I could write a book about you. Oh, who am I kidding, this will still be going on when we married to other people.” As I brushed off guy number one from my past that was haunting my present and potential future… “THE EX” texted me.
Now, we haven’t spoken in weeks , (because while THIS was going on), one of the ex’s friends contacted me with an extremely clASSy text message.
The Friend: do you want to come over and fool around?
Me: excuse me? You do know that I dated your friend… right?
The Friend: so? You guys aren’t together, and I find you attractive.
Me: ::looks at phone in disgust::
I called, “The Ex” the following morning so I could get to the bottom of the story.
Me: What the fuck happened last night? One of your friends sent me a text message last night, asking me if I wanted to, “fool around.”
The Ex: I bet I know who it is. HE, was making jokes about how he found you attractive and wanted to hook up with you.
Me: And you said???
The Ex: Good luck with that, have fun.
Me: fuck you. ::click::
No, I wasn’t pissed off because his friend found me attractive. (Not to sound cocky, but I ‘m not Brown Paper Bag status.) I was mad because the immature, 27 year old son of a bitch I loved at one point was dangling me in front of his friend like a piece of meat.
It’s now 11:33 a.m., and as I wrap up this article I can’t help but to stare over at my phone every once and a while, and to see that little green light blinking; letting me know that regardless of what trials and tribulations we have been through, someone out there is not willing to give up on me, or the idea of us.
Bob Marley once said, “Truth is, everyone’s going to hurt you. You just gotta find the one’s worth suffering for.” My question is, are we only tempted to settle back into old habits because of unconditional love, or do we stick around with the ones that make us suffer because we are too afraid to move on to something new?
OH! By the way, did I mention that Mr. Cali is in New York this week?
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