When you go to a funeral, you most likely get hit with a case of the water works, giving Niagra Falls a run for its money. When you get into a fight with someone, you sometimes wonder if it would be THAT BAD if you choked them out with one of the many extension cords running up your electric bill this holiday season. After an orgasm… you laugh. One of these three analogies DOESN’T belong. Think about it… I’ll wait.
Do I look like a clown to you!?
Excuse me for coming off quite cocky, but I sometimes feel the need to pat myself on the back due to the amazing tricks that I can do with my tongue. I’m talking about causing a grown man to fall to his knees and cry like a chick that’s on her period… amazing. Of course, I’m hypothetically speaking, because if that happened I probably most definitely would hop on the next flight to China, just to avoid any sort of confrontation with Mr. I’m WAY too in tune with my emotions.
Yes, I’ve had to deal with the post blow job giggles. (If it happens a third time; I’m joining the circus).
Case 1: Mr. California
Our, “friendship,” revolved around sex, partying and philosophical conversations about life’s toughest situations. Believe it or not, that combo was not enough to formulate seller performances in the bedroom. Mr. California was selfish, and on one occasion, had to ask me, “how do I know if a girl has an orgasm?” (If you have to ask that, you’re doing it wrong). Regardless of the fact that he would roll over and pass out after he was done, my awesome blowies still took one… two, three…. oh, who is keeping count? for the team. After one of my, “performances,” his response was a laugh. A laugh similar to a devious child that just got away with stealing a bag of candy. Confused, I asked, “what’s so funny?’ He continued to laugh, and said, “It was good. Really good.”
Case 2: Newbie
First of all, I call him Newbie because he is the first guy I have dated since I broke free of my asshole rotation, a.k.a., “The Dreadful Three.” I give him a lot of credit for sticking around because I’m one breakdown from being forced into a physiatric ward. With that being said, Newbie’s a freak. I’m talking, dirty talker, multiple orgasms, I can’t walk right for a few days kind of freak. However, what makes him different from the assholes I’ve had the pleasure of wasting my time with in the past is that he has a heart of gold. Because of this, I have no problem showing my appreciation for his kindness with massive amounts of orgasms. That was until he pulled a Mr. California and laughed after one of my award winning blow jobs. Once again, I had to ask, “What’s so funny?” His response was way too familiar, “It was good, really good.” I shook it off quickly, but really?
Two different dudes.
Two different personalities.
Two different penises.
One response.
::Shrug::
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