This toy came to me via Topco, thanks!

Facts:

• Single speed vibe travels in purse
• Soft, rubbery tip with Silky Smooth case
• Powerful single speed vibrations with on/off button
• Waterproof
• Phthalate free
• 1 AAA battery not included

My first impressions were:

Wow that is a BIG lipstick.

Hm, that’s a funny looking top/cover.

Oooh, is the “lipstick” color, silicone? It looks soft like silicone.

(package opened)

Oo, it is coated, that’s a nice touch.

I wonder if it is rubber or silicone…

“rubbery coating, phthalate free”… it isn’t silicone.

What’s this sucker take? ah AAA, that’s standard.

Push button was a good idea; less ware and tare because you don’t have to twist it on and off.

(battery in)

Easy enough; I put the battery positive side up (nipple up) into the lipstick end instead of the base end, it is always easier to get it closed that way.

(toy on)

Hmm… buzzy.  Buzzy, but a strong buzzy.

-Touch it to nose, earlobe, between the fingers, hold open/close in hand = sensitivity, pinpoint, strength, and noise tests.

(put the cap on)

Repeat sensitivity, pinpoint, strength and, noise tests.

Hmm… feels good with the cap on too, the cap has some possibilities as well.  It scoops, maybe it’ll be like a mini buzzy Clitoral Hummer.

“Contoured cap is easy to remove even with lube on your fingers” so says the package.  Let’s see about that…

(lubes up with both the M and F lubes for the Penthouse Couple’s Make Love lube)

Alright, you CAN get the cap off with lubey fingers.

ah, well, its wet… my fingers are full’ov lube… time for the real test!

(testing… testing… )

It feels better than the Grrl Toyz Lipstick Vibe because of the rubber on it, I can say that much.  I find that sort of odd, since Grrl Toyz is distributed/made by Topco too.  I turned it on and off for a while because it got a little warm; I didn’t want to kill it.  Gave me an orgasm, but only because I was at it for so long… not a frustrating long time… but it wasn’t rumbly bass vibe enough for my liking.  If you’re a quicky buzzy treble vibe person, you should be all over this one.  I really dug the texture, so many lipstick vibes out there are ultra smooth plastic, I’m not really a fan of that at all.

It was also nice with the cap on, it has the ability to cup/cover your clit a little and it isn’t too much less strong.  On second thought, the cap almost creates another “strength” if you think of using it that way.

First seeing it, it reminded me of all those stuck up women who refuse to admit they think vibes are intriguing and would use one if they somehow got their hands on one (bachelorette gift, bday gag gift, random kris kringle…etc) because they’d almost never step foot in a brick and mortar sex shop.  THIS would be a good vibe to get that woman.  They’ll laugh, or get offended, it might even sit in their hidden spot in the house for a month… but they will eventually get curious and turn it on… and *gasp* use it and *double gasp* like it.

In Conclusion: If you need a quicky buzzy vibe to buy, if you’re a beginner, if you don’t know what to get a friend, really like girly things or need an incognito vibe … you can certainly start here.  I think I saw it cheapest on Amazon.com ($10), and as much as $25 on other websites, it is really easy to pick up for yourself even on a budget.

Rating: + + + – -

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This toy came to me via Topco, thanks!

I’ve had a few of those Panty Pal contraptions, I’ve also tried on my fair share of vibrating panties, and the Invisi-Vibe seems to be a mix of the two.  It fits in my hand, and the vibe itself is pretty quiet, but it is positioned on the outside instead of the inside where it would be closer to my clit.  I turned on the mini bullet and it transferred the vibrations good enough, so I did the next logical thing I could think of.

I called my friends to find out what they were doing, one of them was headed to an out door drinking thing at a marina, I was promised good sangria and better conversation – so I stuck the Invisi-Vibe in my panties and out I went.  I was going to wear stretchy pants, but there was a noticeable bulge, so I opted for jeans.  I was too worried about it falling out of my panties if I wore a skirt, it is a little bulky once you stick it down there and walk around… the last thing I wanted was a shift the wrong way and BOUNCE there goes my panty vibe.

It’s a bit fun having a sex toy in your pants, makes me excited knowing I have a dirty secret, but I HAD to make sure I tested the toy the right way.  Of course I told my ride what my new toy was, and how it works… and then I turned it on.  There isn’t a discreet way to do so, unless you excuse yourself to the bathroom.  He said he didn’t hear it unless he was listening for it, that it just sounded like a faint buzzing of something electronic on, a weak cell phone in a purse, MAYBE, if it is quiet enough to listen for it.

Facts:

• Vibe’s contoured curves work with her anatomy to keep vibe in place
• Removable, 3 speed, Push-4-Play, Silky Smooth bullet
• Pleasure bumps enhance sensations
• 3 speed bullet can be used alone or with the toy
• Water resistant
• Phthalate free
• 2 AG5 batteries included

For being so small, the bullet gives a good buzz.  But that’s it.  It is buzzy, and as suspected, since the vibe is on the outer side of the toy, it isn’t incredibly strong.  I can forgive the strength though.  When it comes to bullets, small & buzzy usually means quiet.  Stealthy is good when it comes to something you’re nearly expected to wear out of the house.

I don’t know about you, but if I’m out, partying, or shopping… I can’t orgasm.  I already knew that night would be stimulating and a little frustrating, but at least I had a smile on my face.  The bumpy ridge was nice, but I wish it was doubled so I can slide my clit between it, that would have been really nice.  I tried turning it upside down half way through the night to see if the pressure from the ridge would do anything, but it kept sliding to the side.

When I got home to do some inspecting on how stimulated I was, I can honestly tell you that the Invisi-Vibe does a great job at stimulating.  It does a good job of being your dirty secret. Do I wish it was a little thinner? Stronger?  Sure, but who can actually have an orgasm out and about?  I think the toy did its job.
Invisi-Vibe sat in the box for a few weeks after that night, my time with it was over.  The vibe grew weak because it runs on those little cell batters (ugh), so I knew I’d have to hunt the batteries down again if I wanted to use it a second time.

I was cleaning out my “used once” box of toys recently to see if there was anything in there to give to a friend or throw out and I came across the toy again.  I was about to throw it out and a thought came to me what if I ditched the bullet and used the toy to just rub myself with? The bumps on the ridge were mighty nice… oo… check that out… my finger fits in the hole perfectly…

I admit, it did feel nice with a little lube (I used a Kama Sutra Love Liquid in Warming Cinnamon), TADA!  I think it was actually a better use for the toy!  The hole for the bullet vibe is big enough to stick another mini bullet in there, so I tried putting a different vibe in it and continuing to rub my vag with it.  I enjoyed using the Invisi-Vibe much more this way than just leaving it in my panties.  It built me up to have a nice little orgasm, nothing to write home about, but an orgasm nonetheless.

In Conclusion: It isn’t my favorite toy, but give it a try, just be warned that it could be a little bulky, and the bullet is buzzy.

Rating: + + – - -

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• #13Orgasms Contest Sponsored by @TopcoToys !!

I’m mostly kidding, I have my ways, plus I’m pretty awesome at the whole Item# thing, but still.  We’re all just going to call it the Glo Orange Flicker or or the GGGGROFTVB; pronounced “the Gggro-ftv-b”. (If you haven’t seen Cloudy With A Chance of Meatballs; go fuck yourself, THAT was a funny joke and you missed it.)

Facts:

• Soft Flicker® tip on a vibrating egg
• Super soft sleeve glows in the dark
• Multi-speed controller
• 30″ cord (76 cm)
• Phthalate free
• 2 AA batteries not included

As far as flicker bullets go, I’ve had the Topco Penthouse Secrets Cyber Flicker bullet, and the Climax Flickers 7x bullet made by them too.  So, you can say I’m a fan of flicker bullets and Topco in general.  It also should go without saying that I was happy to get this one to see how it measures up to the others.  AND it reminds me of Empire Records in an ORANGE kind of way, so I was happy to get one in orange and not yellow or green this time around.In comparison to the other two flicker bullets, I say “if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it”.

The GGGRO-FTV-B is the right size if you want to tease yourself and like a light touch on your nipples, clit, vaginal opening, balls, cock etc.  It also isn’t too noisy as bullets tend to be.  The controller is easy to use, and there is a light on the remote which helps you determine if your batteries are new/old and what speed the bullet is on.

The battery compartment is easy to get into, but the controller seems a little flimsy, it doesn’t have that extra “lock” that is on some battery compartments just like it.  Mine didn’t open or cause any problems, so that is easily overlooked.

They also overlapped the silicone dipped cover (which DOES glow in the dark) over the cord which reinforces the cord to the bullet; making the toy last longer against any kind of abuse you put your toys through.  The overlap also makes the toy easier to clean.  Without any nooks and crannies for water to get in, you’re less likely to ruin it.

I use a babywipe for quick cleaning, a toy cleaner, dial soap, or even a 10% bleach solution on my toys depending on the material – cleaning is VERY important.

This bullet compared to the other two, isn’t as powerful.  I usually go for the Penthouse Flicker over the 7x because I personally don’t need pulsey speed settings and just need the vibe to be on the strong side (even though the later two bullets are neck and neck for strongest flicker bullet in my book).

Conclusion: Is this bullet still worth getting if the other two are “better” in my opinion – yes.  Just because I like power, doesn’t mean you do.  The different colors are welcome too, and if you keep your toys in a semi transparent/transparent box – this one is easy to find in the dark.

Rating: + + + + -

It could have easily become my favorite flicker to date, but it just didn’t have the power.

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And so it sat as my update for a bit – and then I got an email from @TopcoToys during my lunch break asking if I’d run a contest.  I knew not being superstitious (and constantly horny) would pay off!!

HELL YEAH!

They have a Mask made of Spandex with zipper eyes and mouth for sensory deprivation from their Asylum line, (which is hot and fresh and brand spankin new!!) which is their bondage-y medical-y fetish line.  I can’t even buy the Asylum line for my store yet!! So you will be one of the firsts to own the mask.

They have paddles, straight jackets, ball gags… and more to come.  For the purposes of this contest, I’m going to call it a “Jason Mask” and ask you:

If I was your captive, how would you “torture” me?

The mask comes in large and small, and is unisex (bonus! because I’m bisexual!) — so slip it on, and torture me (please!)

Contest closes midnight on 8-13-2010

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• FLASH! First Vivid, Now Topco Approaches Montana Fishburne

Adult Manufacturer Seeks to Replicate Montana Fishburne’s Intimate Assets

Chatsworth, CA – Leading adult novelty manufacturer, Topco Sales, has offered Montana Fishburne, daughter of actor Laurence Fishburne a “once in a lifetime” opportunity.

On Friday, July 30, 2010, the company announced its intentions in an open letter authored by Topco Sales CEO, Scott Tucker, asking the nineteen year old Fishburne if she would be interested in creating a personalized adult novelty replica.

“We have seen in various media outlets that you are set to release a film on Vivid.com in August,” states Tucker. “We think that having your very own toy would be a great way for you to fully capitalize on your porn debut.”

If Ms. Fishburne accepts this offer, she will join the ranks of famous adult superstars such as Audrey Hollander, Bree Olson, Nautica Thorn, Joanna Angel and Taylor Vixen who have all been molded for the company’s Wildfire Celebrity Series.

“Topco Sales is known for molding porn stars and making the most realistic replica sex toys on the market. Using amazing CyberSkin material, these toys are incredibly lifelike and highly sought after,” says Desiree Duffie, Director of Marketing and Public Relations for Topco Sales.

To read the original letter—>

RE: A personalized adult novelty Pussy and Ass replica

Dear Montana Fishburne, I am contacting you on behalf of Topco Sales with the hope that you may have an interest in working with us to create a lifelike CyberSkin replica of your Pussy and Ass. We have seen in various media outlets that you are set to release a film on Vivid.com in August and we think that having your very own toy would be a great way for you to fully capitalize on your porn debut.

In case you are unfamiliar with Topco Sales, please allow me to tell you a bit about our company: Topco Sales began manufacturing adult novelties in 1973 and has grown to become one ofthe leading manufacturers in the industry. For over 37 years Topco has based its businessmodel on quality and innovation to create a variety of groundbreaking products and classicdesigns.

Among the company’s many achievements are the creation of the first battery-free integrated circuit (I.C.) operated vibrators and the groundbreaking CyberSkin material,which provides unparalleled realism in its mimicking of human skin. Topco excels at adapting state-of-the-art technological capabilities to consumer needs, and continually improves upon its best-selling products, expanding the spectrum of what is possible within the adult toy industry.

The company is headquartered in Chatsworth, California, with FDA-approved facilities and is home to the largest Materials-and-Process Research Center within the industry.Utilizing these extensive resources, Topco Sales is able to manufacture everything fromvibrators and dildos to lubricants and cosmetics.In closing, we here at Topco Sales would be honored to work with you on this project andbelieve that your Pussy and Ass would make a wonderful addition to the Topco family. Please, contact us using the information below if you are interested in discussing this once in a lifetime opportunity!

Sincerely,

Scott Tucker,

CEO Topco Sales

Please visit www.topcosales.us.

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First and foremost this is single-handedly one of the most beautiful sex toys I’ve ever come across. It is made of black CyberGlass ™ and is called “Onyx,” and it’s decorated with beautifully painted leaf motifs. It is crafty, sophisticated and sleek in design.

Facts:

• Beautiful CyberGlass ™ prostate wand provides smooth, comfortable insertion
• Rounded handle and specially angles tip with raised edges easily massages the prostate
• CyberGlass ™ conducts hot and cold temperatures without cracking or breaking
• Quickly warms to body temperature during use
• CyberGlass™  is easy to clean; it can be boiled or placed on the top rack of the dishwasher
• Ultra hygienic, waterproof and nonporous
• Phthalate free

Fun:

Don’t expect to get an automatic Screaming “O” this little tool but do expect to be pleasantly surprised with subtle sensations that you have neglected all your life! This is a really exploratory toy and if you don’t know where your “Spot” is you are sure to pin-point it with this magical wand. While un-boxing I thought the massager would hit my spot instantly, this is not true it takes a few trys so don’t be intimidated keep going until it feels good.

Solo: The shape of this massager is purrrrfecct to use on yourself because of the arched shape.  You are sure to find your prostate because of the arch. But make sure to use plenty of lube and relax.  If you have never “found” your prostate it takes a few trys to find it, take a minute to explore and discover dont be intimidated! At first I was a little intimidated and frustrated because it was the first time trying such a toy. I really believe once you use this toy and find your “P”  you will find that sex becomes more intense because you know exactly where you need that push. Take the time to massage your perineum, you can use the tip of your prostate massager. Once you have inserted it inside it feels like a godly finger is probing around in your anus. You will feel such gentle sensations and really get to know your inner self. The tip of the massager has ridges; feels awesome with just a slight steady or rhythmic pressure you will feel your “P” send out signals of Bliss.

If you’re feeling adventurous you can actually turn the massager around and use the grip, which gave me a totally different feeling. The other side is bigger and has a bumpy shape, which will take you on a deeper felt ride. Make sure to give love to every angle inside which you can do easily just by turning the massager wherever you please. This is a Great tool for giving yourself or someone else a deep anal massage, why use your fingers when you can try something NEW!?

Partner: This massager can be used on a partner. It is a great way to show someone just how much you love them by giving them a anal prostate massage. Make sure to be gentle and never insert or pull out too fast because the tip has ridges, which might hurt if abruptly taken out.  You can experiment more by telling your partner to squeeze their pelvic muscle to see what reaction they might get in their prostate.  I really learned a few things about his behind with this tool, and we connected on a totally new level. I also recommend this to anyone who has been fantasizing about anal sex. This tool is a perfect size which is not intrusive but will still get someone to open up, enjoy and relax with anal play. Anyone that is apprehensive to anal penetration should start with this type of toy because you can discover your “P” and figure out how you like it! Ladies you should use these on your men! They will love it! Its also great that it looks pretty masculine and is not in the shape of a cock, so straight men will not feel “GAY”.

Cleaning: Wash with liquid anti-bacterial soap and water. Climax toy cleaner is also appropriate.

Conclusion: I would definitely recommend this product to any male straight or gay who wants to explore there G spot.

Rating:+ + + + -

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Facts:

• Supper supple Cyberskin stroker feels soft,like real skin
• Surprise him with a sexy, sensual addition to foreplay
• Pump it up and down, varying your rhythm
• The tapered, ribbed tunnel grips him tighter the deeper he plunges into the stroker
• Hourglass shape provides a perfect grip even when lubricated
• Squeeze tight or loosen your grip to tease him with different sensations
• Tight ribbed tunnel creates a mouth watering suction effect when filled with his manliness
• Translucent design lets both of you watch every sexy stroke
• Open ended for easy cleaning
• Waterproof for sexy handjobs in the shower
• Phthalate free

Fun:

This Emerald CX Gem has a continuous corkscrew shape rib which creates intense stimulation that you will seriously never forget! When inside the Cx Gem it feels like a Vagina, Behind & Mouth all at the same time. You can definitely vary the the intensity of your grip and play with various rhythms which make the Gem unique. I suggest running the toy under warm water or apply a warming water based lube before use so it will feel like warm flesh. I used System Jo’s water based lube but I found the Climax Water Based lube works too.

Solo – In Shower The Emerald Cx Gem felt great in the shower! I used very little lube and the heat of the shower created a very convincing sensation. Cx Gem will give you a continuous strong grip even when wet in the shower due to it hourglass shape. The toy does not get softer or loose shape in heat.
Partner - Hand Jobs.   I’m one of those people who has never found enjoyment or excitement giving a guy a hand job.  No matter how good you are at giving a hand job it normally takes a guy quite a while to “Climax”. Traditional hand-jobs also make your hands feel sticky and you need to reapply lube. With Cx Gem giving a hand job will never feel like a chore again!
I enjoyed using this on a partner, its definitely hot seeing his manliness moving up and down inside the gem. With Cx Gem your hands will never get slimy and sticky, simply squeeze a generous amount of your favorite water based lube inside; pump it up and down while varying your grip and rhythm. He loved it, he said during sex with women and men he has never felt that kind of sensation on his manliness. He normally takes FOREVER to come with this toy it didn’t take long at all! It was also great not having my hand stuck in a permeant grip after giving him a traditional hand job.

Partner – Together If you are gay you need to try this! I love getting experimental with toys! My partner suggested I put my manliness in one end and his in the other. The top end opening of the Gem is much smaller than the opening at the base, it is quite deceiving. It was definitely hot using the toy this way. We were able to glide the toy back and forth regardless of the tight opening at the top. We both enjoyed this experience it was a new way to enjoy frontage! We will definitely be doing that again!

Cleaning: Is minimal, use a toy cleaner or a mild soap like dial.

Rating: + + + + -

Since this was my first stroker tool, I wont give it a perfect score (but hey, ya never know).

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I got a chance to sit down with Ms. Blow herself; and she had set up an array of  TOPCO RASCAL Dildos waiting for me.  It looked like a “SEX” Tupperware party! Ms. Blow said pick two. As my backdoor has not been stimulated for quite a while solo or with a partner, it wasn’t hard to choose which dildo I would be going home with. The biggest one! Superstar Jeremy Bilding; What a piece of meat!  I wanted a rough backdoor session and that soft supple looking, slight upwards curve, big head, slightly veiny shaft and big ball sac … had me squirming before I got home!

Facts:

• Molded from Porn Superstar Jeremy Bilding
• 5.75 insertable inches (14.5 cm) and 2″ (5 cm) diameter
• Hand painted SensaFirm™ looks and feels just like Jeremy
• Suction cup base provides hands-free play on any smooth flat surface
• Compatible with standard strap-on harnesses
• Made in the USA

SensaFirm is a unique dual Layered product made from a soft Flexible rubber outer Layer,and precision bonded with a silicone substrate to a hard inner core. The finished product is radically superior to traditional solid rubber and creates a sensual exterior surface that is velvety smooth to the touch, yet firm when used.

NSFW pic of the toy and my review after the cut

Fun:

This was my first experience with SensaFirm it is my new favorite! SensaFirm has a completely different feel from rubber latex plastic cyberskin and gelatin. SensaFirm feels soft and velvety on the outer layer, the core feels Firm and tough. SensaFirm feels like the real-deal!
This dildo is perfect for Anal, not too soft not too hard. This dildo looks and feels like the real thing. I had to keep looking back, I couldn’t believe how real it looked and felt as I slowly let it inside of me! The shape of this cock allows you to go deep inside and the slight curve makes love to your prostate. My eyes were completely in the back of my head as I quivered with excitement! I couldn’t stop bouncing on it! It felt perfect! I gave my legs and behind a complete toning as I was in a Fast-Forward motion!

The Suction will hold tight while you Lock Rock and Pop. Previous dildos I have used do not have such a powerful suction quality.

CLEANING This toy is very easy to clean, I used very hot water and a mild soap (dial), but you can also use toy cleaner.

CONCLUSION This toy is definitely now a part of my “anal arsenal”! I would recommend it to any of my gay friends looking for an amazing rock hard dildo!

Rating +++++

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I wasn’t able to go, but I’ve been seeing all kinds of teasers on twitter and talking with my company contacts as well as my like minded peers in the blogging and reviewing industry… and found out all KINDS of new info to share with you all.

Sure, there are new toys coming out of every line possible… Doc Johnson, Jimmy Jane and NassToys NOT excluded… but it seems Topco has stolen the spotlight this year with their Side Show tent and their display of FUCKED toys.

Inside the creepy circus tent, in the brightly lit room, held secrets only whispered about before the ANME doors opened.  Where toys meet fetish, meets paraphilia, FUCKED shines.

You remember what paraphilia means right? We went over this… “a condition wherein a person’s sexual arousal and gratification depend upon fantasizing about and engaging in, sexual behavior that is atypical and at times, controversial.”

If you have the desire to have sex with a woman while she was on her period — If you have the desire to have sex with someone with an STD — A Hermaphrodite –  Or are into Coprophilia…

STEP RIGHT UP !!… enter the tent.

NSFW pics of the new FUCKED sex toys.

CyberSkin Bleeding Pussy Stroker

Vomiting Mouth Stroker (appropriately scented)

Hermaphrodite Cock, Pussy and Ass.

(also appropriately scented)

The Bug Chaser

Special thanks to Kristy of Pretty Power Tools fame, for posting her reviews and photos of the ANME show!  She is on part 3 right now, and I know she still has a bunch of ground to cover.  I’ll be patiently waiting for part 4..5..6.. (etc) to be posted. You rock pretty lady, keep up the great work!!!

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Topco’s Grrl Shorts Strap-On Boy Shorts Harness

Men insecure with their sexuality consider pegging “gay” or “homosexual”, I’d like to point out that they are wrong, since Pegging happens between the opposite sexes, and homosexual anal sex is between same-sex partners. Just because something goes into an ass doesn’t make it gay. It depends on if the person who puts it there has a penis or a vagina.

Finally, Pegging is pretty hot. Before you approach your partner about it, make sure you know what your doing by reading up on some resources, and getting the proper gear that’s right for you.

<3 Puddles

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This sleek toy came to me by surprise, Topco had asked me to make a list of stuff I was interested in and they forwarded me this toy while I waited for my goodies.  I opened the unsuspecting brown box to find a cute faux leather carrying case with “Vida” imprinted on the front.  Curiousity unzipped the case to reveal to me a 7″ black and pink, Zara vibe hidden inside that seemed to be made of metal and ultra hygenic silicone.

My first thoughts were to grab some batteries, but further inspection of my surprise package revealed that it was rechargeable.  I crossed my fingers, closed my eyes, and held down the single button controller to see if it was charged in the package… AND IT WAS!  I love when that happens.

It buzzed to life in my fingers, a buzzy treble like vibe – not a rumbly bass’y vibe.  Kinda like Lelo’s Nea, hm.  I clicked the button again to see if it had another speed and I’m pleased to report back that the Zara has 5 distinguishable speeds.

My exploritory examination over with, I shut my new Zara off, placed it back in the case… opened the manual and watched the clock.

“Zara caresses your internal erogenous area with a concentration you’ve never experienced before.  Focused entirely on G-Spot stimulation, waterproof Zara satisfies your lust for the pleasures of this previously abstruse spot.”

Facts:

• G-Spot Vibrator
• 5 Speeds
• Quiet
• Rechargeable
• Waterproof
• Made of: Anodized Aluminum, silicone (phthalate free)
• Faux leather case includes: Zara, charger, microfiber storage bag and the manual.
• 1 Year Warranty

Fun:

While at work, I charged the toy further, after all I didn’t know just how much juice Zara had and I didn’t need it to go dead at any pinnacle moments.  Its a nice perk to be able to charge my new toys at work, unlike the rest of you who have to wait…tehe.

I caught a couple hours alone later that night and set up my station.  Since Zara is made of silicone I took out a water based lube (Climax Bursts Tingle, if you must know), a movie I’m reviewing (Fuck Sasha Grey) and my towel to mop up the potential aftermath.

To cycle through the speeds you have to turn it on (hold the button for a few seconds) and click it again and again for each of the speeds (5 in total). Turning the toy off was easy too (hold the button for a few seconds again).

Zara is cold to the touch and a little heavier than you’d expect it to be because of the materials, but it warms up just fine and has a great shape to it.  I used it to warm myself up, tested the speeds on my nipples and breasts, slid it around my vulva teasing myself.  The rounded head shape is really nice, some G-Spot toys are too pointy, I don’t understand that… why would you -poke- the G-Spot when you could -rub- it with something round.

I really like how silicone changes when lube is put on it, the material becomes almost like a tongue – rough, but slippery.  As my movie progressed, and my arousal from the buzzing of the Zara heightened, I slid it into me slowly looking for my G-Spot.  Since I know where mine is, it was simple to find with this toy… in this moment I really wished for it to be a little stronger.  The buzzy treble vibrations are great for arousal for me personally, but they don’t always allow me to orgasm; especially if it is a G-Spot toy.
While I didn’t have a bed wrecking orgasm, Zara did get me off, and it was easy to use.

I washed it off with a moist wipe, and placed it in the microfiber wrap, which I have to tell you… is awesome.  I have ziplock baggies and old tshirts wrapped around my toys and my labeling system sucks.  To quickly know what is in each bundle all toys should have their own self labeled pouch like this one.

In Conclusion:

I liked how the button glows (makes it really easy to find), and that you don’t have to cycle through the speeds to get it to turn off. The silicone was cushy and the round head on it was a great shape for G-Spot seeking.  Zara is quiet, buzzy, rechargeable and looks cool.  But I’m not in love love with treble vibes, it isn’t MY ultimate vibe, but it is a well made buzzy vibe.  If you are in love with treble vibes, get this one from Vida.  For everything Zara is, it could quickly become your favorite buzzy G-Spot vibe.

Rating: + + + – -

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I used to be concerned with cumming too soon.  Now it seems the tables have turned.  I focus on pleasing my lady and only think about cumming after she’s satisfied.  By that time, my dick is almost completely numb.  How can I find a healthy balance?

As a woman, I can say that seems like the best table in the restaurant.  But not entirely fair to you;  good thing I have a three special suggestions on my menu today.

A.

Is she slacking on you a little since she is so spoiled now? If so, turn the table on her a bit and ask for a blow job before you go down on her, and have sex.  It’ll ease your mind about cumming too soon, you’ll be pleased from the beginning, and you’ll both be able to enjoy sex its orgasms.

B.

You can get something for yourself that will encourage your brain to remember about your own needs.  I suggest a shiny 2″ metal cock ring. Yep.  You can get one online, or in your local adult shop – if they don’t have them, they can order it for you. The Lex Steele ring from Topco is my favorite, and my stunt cock’s favorite too.  No, I’m not just saying that… I know there are others. We’ve tried rings from Spartacus and California Exotics; silicone, and rubber rings too.  I’m trying to get my hands on a Cobra.

Put your balls through it first, then your penis – WHILE YOU ARE SOFT.  That is the best way, and the best kind of ring to wear FOR YOU.  Your orgasm will feel 10x better, which can easily jump start your brain into being a little selfish.

The ring helps keep you harder than morning wood as well, so really it is a win win win situation.  Trust me, don’t be nervous.  Once you cum, you can take the ring off.  This time it isn’t about “needing” a ring for “help”, it is to enhance your experience and be a physical reminder for your brain to focus on… plus… they look crazy sexy.  Some people describe cock rings as “bras for your cock” because it lifts your erection and makes it bigger.  I think they’re drool enticing because I know my guy means business when he puts it on.

C.

Change positions, go from oral on you, to sex, to oral on her, to sex, to more oral on you.  A good mix of changing things up a couple of times during a sex session can also help you.  You found a menu that works for her, but it is your turn now!

Thanks for asking your question, I hope I helped; if you want more info don’t hesitate to ask.  That goes for the rest of you out there too! Ask me anything, and I’ll answer you.

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Climax Fruit Bomb Strawberry Fields – wow.  Seriously, just wow. The whole line is AMAZING.  There is also Chery Cola, Blue Razzberry, Coco Pineapple, Kiwi Lime and Orange Dreamcicle.

Facts:

• 4 fl. oz. (118 ml) bottle
• A delightfully fresh burst of juicy strawberry flavor in a lubricant
• Pump top bottle of edible, spreadable fun
• Gorgeous, discreet design can sit on any nightstand
• Made in USA

Fun:

First, it passed my finger test.  I put a drop of lube in the palm of my hand and rub it till it gets sticky or snotty – this one didn’t!  It stayed slick for an abnormally long time.  It made me check to see if it was silicone based; nope, water based!  I was shocked, normal flavored lubes get gross almost immediately.  Next I tasted it.

I swear to you, it tastes like an actual factual strawberry.  Off the vine.  Not that crappy commercial sucky strawberry “flavored” taste.  No, it TASTES like an actual strawberry.  My brain was waiting to come into contact with a seed it was so real tasting.  Drum-roll please .. … … … … and it has no sucky chapstick icky after taste!!!

Sold, I was SOLD right then and there – I HAD to open up the other bottles to taste them.  The razzberry was a ripe raspberry, the orange dreamcicle tastes like icecream, coco pineapple tastes like the best pinacolada you’ve ever had… and before I start to sound like the kids licking wallpaper at the Wonka Factory… you get the point.

My partner thought the lube tasted great (and he HATES flavored lube), and it didn’t get sticky on us.  It was safe to use with all my toys and the ladies and gents at my workshops rave about Climax Fruit Bombs.  Clients come back month after month to get their favorite flavor or try something new.  I proudly put these lubricants on my tester shelf and let people sample them – after one lick – they are smitten.

Conclusion:

Since Climax bombs have opened up my mind to trying flavored lubes again, I’ve been retrying and ordering new products – but as far as price, amount you get in the bottle and flavor – the average Jack and Jane will LOVE this product!

It was love at first swipe, but the brand snobs will say it is the best in its price range.

Rating: + + + + +

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When Jane gave me this package, I did a double take.  Three of the strokers came in one package, they’re bright blue, and they look to be kinda small.  I was borderline insulted and completely curious.  She laughed and told me “Don’t worry, they stretch, use this lube and trust me.” I stuffed the package back in the bag and went home, trying to keep an open mind.

My hand has always been enough, she already gave me lotions.  They turned out to be cool, I guess I had to trust these thingies too.  The packing was easy to get into, I like how they have their own “space”, easy to store.  That was something I thought when I got them.  Where was I going to hide them?!  Back in the box is the answer, tucked under jeans or in the back of the closet is my answer.

Fact:

• They are about 5 inches long
• Made of Clear/Blue Cyberskin
• Stretchy

Finally getting a day alone to use them, I opened the box and the jiggled.  Weird.  I picked up “the butt” first and squeezed it, stretched it, stuck my finger in it… my hands were fascinated with this squishy thing.  I put a finger in it and tried to stretch it out… learned REALLY quick I can fit IN it.  Now I know why Jane laughed.  They stretch, a lot!

Fun:

Alright, lube time.  Worked myself up, put a bit of ID Glide on me and in the butt and maneuvered it so I can get my dick in it.  I fumbled a little, but once I got in, it was easier to stroke with.

Honestly, it was one of the coolest sensations (since the elbow grease).  I’ve never used a stroker before.  It didn’t feel like a girl, or butt… but it was weird, cool to the touch, and tight, and soft.  I tried slipping it on and off my dick, but that didn’t work out too well. So I went for a half stroke that felt good too.  Then I put myself all the way through it so my dick’s head was out, that felt good too.  What felt really good though was using it backwards.  I was holding it different ways to see if it would change anything, and doing that allowed me to put my finger over the little hole.  Doing that made suction… which made me grab “the mouth” stroker.

Other than being a different orifice, I didn’t fell much difference.  The inside textures seem to be formed from the same molds.  It still felt like pockets of ribs, which feels cool enough.  I decided when one of them got too funky, I’d throw it out and use one of the others.  I tried stacking them for a two handed jerk, it was ok.  Too much to think about.

I still had the clean up problem.  With my hand I just wipe it off w a towel or do that hand trick we guys do and wash up.  With the Cyberskin Translucent Stroker Triplets, I don’t know if I used too much lube but I had to clean me up, wash them out (which was really easy- ran warm water through it and a little soap. Done!) and let them dry before I could put them away.

In Conclusion:

If you have a girlfriend, or not… they’re worth a try.  It was fun, they make jerking off less of a chore.  I’ve used them dozens of time already and I like that I have a choice between it and just me and the hand lotions.  I haven’t let my girlfriend see them yet, she is curious, but for now they’re just for me.  I have day dreamed if we can role play a threesome with it, my girl isn’t the sharing type.

Rating:

+ + + – - These strokers get 2 minus because

a) I wish they were longer

b) First impressions

I don’t think I’d pick these three up myself from a store based on first impressions but if you have someone like Jane behind the counter talking you into them – grab them.  You have to think “why not” and keep an open mind.

In Jane I trust!

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Know what else?  I’m tired of toys I pay for breaking after a few uses and they don’t come with a warranty.  I’d spend the extra $20 for a better quality toy.

Quite frankly, I know what a cock feels like.  All of these “realistic” “cyberskin” toys are nice, but I want something different.

If I am, I know you are too.

( IF YOU CANNOT LOOK AT SEX TOYS AT WORK – THE REST OF THIS POST IS NSFW)

When I’m in this sort of mood, I reach for something futuristic, fun, colorful… I take out a luxury Lelo.

No, not Leeloo; although that would be cool too.

When men come in to shop without their ladies, we compaire toys to cars (something they understand).  It makes the process easier.  For scale we’ll call something from California Exotics a Ford (it’ll work if you take care of it), Topco gets Volvo (reliable, fun and safe), Doc Johnson is Cadillac (better made, sort of luxury).

Then there is the Swedish Lelo the Koenigsegg.

Yes, Luxury means you’ll be paying more.  But they are so worth it.  Made of medical grade plastics and vibrantly colored silicone means they are safe for your body.  Better than cyberskin and rubber at transferring vibrations too.  Lelo is also ergonomically shaped for your body and your hands which not only makes them easier to use; Lelo will also find “your spot” quicker!

Every model is rechargeable, VERY quiet, and has a warranty.  Lelo vibrators have an average of 4 speeds on each vibrator, and then 3 different pulse modes.

They have Contour Vibes, which are small and fit our hands just right: Nea and Lily.

Nea

Mini Vibes that charge with a USB: Mia

Mia

Sexy Cock Rings and Tools made just for Men: Bo, Bob, and Billy. (Billy is an adaption of one of their female Gspot vibes… they found reviews of men using it, then adapted it to fit a Man’s needs.)

G-Spot Vibes: GiGi, Mona, Iris, and Ella.

GiGi

Regular fun Vibes: Liv and Elise.

Dual-Action Models (their version of a Rabbit): is called Ina.

Duo-Tone Balls which double as Kegal Exercisers: Luna Beads.

Luna

And Superduper Luxe:

Gold Plated: upwards of 2k

Our favs are GiGi, Mia and Bo.  They’re delicious, powerful, quiet, super easay to use…worth every penny in a serious way.  The controls on GiGi and the other vibes take a minute to get used to, but once you do the patterns are endless and awesome.  Mia is excellent because you can charge it anywhere you find a USB and it has a double double identity.  If someone finds it in your purse it looks like a lipstick, and if they open it they might think it is an odd jump drive! Bo is easily consealed, stretches, does his job, plus it doesn’t look like a dolphin or some other stupid animal.

All of which can be found online, or the shop we work at!

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