Posts about Topco

Review: Zara by Vida Internationale / Topco Sales

Posted by on 7/8/10 at 11:06 am

Special thanks to Topco for sending me the Zara from Vida!

This sleek toy came to me by surprise, Topco had asked me to make a list of stuff I was interested in and they forwarded me this toy while I waited for my goodies.  I opened the unsuspecting brown box to find a cute faux leather carrying case with “Vida” imprinted on the front.  Curiousity unzipped the case to reveal to me a 7″ black and pink, Zara vibe hidden inside that seemed to be made of metal and ultra hygenic silicone.

My first thoughts were to grab some batteries, but further inspection of my surprise package revealed that it was rechargeable.  I crossed my fingers, closed my eyes, and held down the single button controller to see if it was charged in the package… AND IT WAS!  I love when that happens.

It buzzed to life in my fingers, a buzzy treble like vibe – not a rumbly bass’y vibe.  Kinda like Lelo’s Nea, hm.  I clicked the button again to see if it had another speed and I’m pleased to report back that the Zara has 5 distinguishable speeds.

My exploritory examination over with, I shut my new Zara off, placed it back in the case… opened the manual and watched the clock.

“Zara caresses your internal erogenous area with a concentration you’ve never experienced before.  Focused entirely on G-Spot stimulation, waterproof Zara satisfies your lust for the pleasures of this previously abstruse spot.”

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Dear Jane: I Used to Finish Before Her, Now I Get Numb!

Posted by on 6/16/10 at 11:13 am

Dear Jane,

I used to be concerned with cumming too soon.  Now it seems the tables have turned.  I focus on pleasing my lady and only think about cumming after she’s satisfied.  By that time, my dick is almost completely numb.  How can I find a healthy balance?

As a woman, I can say that seems like the best table in the restaurant.  But not entirely fair to you;  good thing I have a three special suggestions on my menu today.

A.

Is she slacking on you a little since she is so spoiled now? If so, turn the table on her a bit and ask for a blow job before you go down on her, and have sex.  It’ll ease your mind about cumming too soon, you’ll be pleased from the beginning, and you’ll both be able to enjoy sex its orgasms.

B.

You can get something for yourself that will encourage your brain to remember about your own needs.  I suggest a shiny 2″ metal cock ring. Yep.  You can get one online, or in your local adult shop – if they don’t have them, they can order it for you.

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Review: Climax Fruit Bomb Lubricant

Posted by on 6/3/10 at 9:45 am

Flavored lubricants have a really bad reputation.  They usually taste nasty – like melted chapstick or worse.  They get sticky, and slimey -ick.  I long ago gave up on flavored lubes for personal use.  Nothing was ever good enough… but then I started doing oral workshops and we needed a flavored lube to stand behind.  The search was ON again, in full force.  After fingertip after fingertip if disgusting lubes – I came across this one!

Climax Fruit Bomb Strawberry Fields – wow.  Seriously, just wow. The whole line is AMAZING.  There is also Chery Cola, Blue Razzberry, Coco Pineapple, Kiwi Lime and Orange Dreamcicle.

Facts:

  • 4 fl. oz. (118 ml) bottle
  • A delightfully fresh burst of juicy strawberry flavor in a lubricant
  • Pump top bottle of edible, spreadable fun
  • Gorgeous, discreet design can sit on any nightstand
  • Made in USA

Fun:

First, it passed my finger test.  I put a drop of lube in the palm of my hand and rub it till it gets sticky or snotty – this one didn’t!  It stayed slick for an abnormally long time.  It made me check to see if it was silicone based; nope, water based!  I was shocked, normal flavored lubes get gross almost immediately.  Next I tasted it.

I swear to you, it tastes like an actual factual strawberry.  Off the vine.  Not that crappy commercial sucky strawberry “flavored” taste.  No, it TASTES like an actual strawberry.  My brain was waiting to come into contact with a seed it was so real tasting.  Drum-roll please .. … … … … and it has no sucky chapstick icky after taste!!!

Sold, I was SOLD right then and there – I HAD to open up the other bottles to taste them.  The razzberry was a ripe raspberry, the orange dreamcicle tastes like icecream, coco pineapple tastes like the best pinacolada you’ve ever had… and before I start to sound like the kids licking wallpaper at the Wonka Factory… you get the point.

My partner thought the lube tasted great (and he HATES flavored lube), and it didn’t get sticky on us.  It was safe to use with all my toys and the ladies and gents at my workshops rave about Climax Fruit Bombs.  Clients come back month after month to get their favorite flavor or try something new.  I proudly put these lubricants on my tester shelf and let people sample them – after one lick – they are smitten.

Conclusion:

Since Climax bombs have opened up my mind to trying flavored lubes again, I’ve been retrying and ordering new products – but as far as price, amount you get in the bottle and flavor – the average Jack and Jane will LOVE this product!

It was love at first swipe, but the brand snobs will say it is the best in its price range.

Rating: + + + + +

Topco Sales Sex Toy Authorized Reviewer

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Review: Cyberskin Stroker Triplets

Posted by on 4/29/10 at 10:39 am

My Stunt Cock “Mikey” strikes again!  Special thanks to @TopcoToys for sending me this “tester” package.  Guys, here is a trio to think about adding to your arsenal.

When Jane gave me this package, I did a double take.  Three of the strokers came in one package, they’re bright blue, and they look to be kinda small.  I was borderline insulted and completely curious.  She laughed and told me “Don’t worry, they stretch, use this lube and trust me.” I stuffed the package back in the bag and went home, trying to keep an open mind.

My hand has always been enough, she already gave me lotions.  They turned out to be cool, I guess I had to trust these thingies too.  The packing was easy to get into, I like how they have their own “space”, easy to store.  That was something I thought when I got them.  Where was I going to hide them?!  Back in the box is the answer, tucked under jeans or in the back of the closet is my answer.

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Leeloo Would Be Proud of Lelo

Posted by on 11/19/09 at 12:37 pm

I’m tired of replacing batteries, charging batteries, worrying if the batteries are going to explode…and the dreaded “I’m about to cum but fear my batteries are dieing” feeling. I’d spend the extra $20 for a rechargeable toy.

Know what else?  I’m tired of toys I pay for breaking after a few uses and they don’t come with a warranty.  I’d spend the extra $20 for a better quality toy.

Quite frankly, I know what a cock feels like.  All of these “realistic” “cyberskin” toys are nice, but I want something different.

If I am, I know you are too.

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