You Must Be THIS Long To Ride - Fellas!  If you’re not big enough to fit into a Magnum…..DON”T USE ONE! The story goes: Joey is fooling around with Sally (kissing, rubbing, etc.) and the signal to escalate things is given, “do you have a condom?”.  Joey, with a big grin, pulls out that shiny golden wrapped MAGNUM condom and sees Sally’s eyes [...]

Fellas!  If you’re not big enough to fit into a Magnum…..DON”T USE ONE!

The story goes:

Joey is fooling around with Sally (kissing, rubbing, etc.) and the signal to escalate things is given, “do you have a condom?”.  Joey, with a big grin, pulls out that shiny golden wrapped MAGNUM condom and sees Sally’s eyes light up.  She lays back and waits for her prize.  After 5-10 minutes Joey ejaculates, pulls out, and realizes his penis is bare.  “Oh no! Where’s the condom?”.  That’s right, it is inside Sally.

Sally runs out of the room in a panic and performs what looks like “a little girl’s pee-pee dance” for Joey’s roommate.  Over and over she repeats “It’s stuck!  It’s stuck!”.  She runs into the bathroom, slams the door, and after a few minutes the sound of a tire deflating is heard.  She strolls out a much relieved girl.

Why did the condom get stuck inside her you ask? Because Joey’s penis was NOT big enough to fill out a Magnum sized condom so it slipped right off.  Aside from the trouble of getting the condom out of the girl afterward, you have also crossed over into UNPROTECTED SEX.  If the condom comes off in the beginning of sex, it’s as if you never put one on!  That’s right kids, the risk of STD’s and pregnancy are at threat level MIDNIGHT……yep, MIDNIGHT.

Whether you use a Magnum or a fitted sized condom, the girl is most likely going to see your penis anyway.  The brain can fool the eyes to a certain extent, but if you’re 4-5″ and she sees a Magnum in your hand……..SHE ALREADY KNOWS YOU ARE 4-5″.  Plus, girls can feel penis size.  The vagina is an endless supply of nerve endings.

There are a HUGE variety of condoms for every penis out there, (See Condoms by Size), make sure you find the condom that fits you best.

Be proud of your penis, big or small.  You know what’s better than lying? BEING CONFIDENT, girls love it!  You know what’s also better than lying?  Not catching or transmitting an STD!

Also, if you are well endowed, go buy Magnums! Using a condom that’s too small can result in it breaking and then you’re in the same boat as the liar, UNPROTECTED SEX, I’ve been there.

“Get strapped with protection or strapped with disease” – Sublime

-The Silo