Health & Statistics

Dear Jane: My Friend Told Me I Can Use My Ear Wax to See if a Woman Has an STD, is That True?

Dear Jane, <– Look at the other questions people have asked, or ask one of your own. It is completely anonymous.

Ok, Truth be told, no one asked me this for real. BUT, there was a time before Google… and during that time we would ask our friends for sex advice and we weren’t completely spot on. The “fake” question proposed in this post may or may not had been given to a younger kid (let’s say somewhere in the age bracket of 9-11) from older cousins – back in the late 80’s, early 90’s when not all homes had a computer.

I don’t know the whole story, but the kid (today, retelling the story) said his cousins lied to him. But before Google was at everyone’s fingertips so easily, the cousins could have very well thought that sticking your finger in your ear, then sticking it in a vagina and if it tingled… was a sign of an STD.  Think about all the wrong info you had floating around in your head when you were a kid getting half real answers from your parents, or nonsense you overheard siblings and cousins say.

For the record, no… no you can’t tell if a woman has an STD by this method. You need to go to a clinical center for a blood test to see if you have an STD (STI).

Moral of the story? Trial and error is how many people learn how to have sex and we’ve all heard our friends/older relatives say some whacky stuff. Some of it true, most of it not.

Question authority, but more importantly, fact check before you try any of the whacky stuff you hear about.  Google is good… for finding people with more authority on a subject. Take anal sex for example, when I need to make sure any info I give to you is true, I’ll grab a book by Tristian Taormino.

It is best to check with a professional if you want any real answers about your health… not a friend, and usually not the internet (it will probably tell you you’re going to die… yes I’m looking at you WebMd-ers). Most people wait 3 days before seeking help whether it be a common cold, or a pervertable lodged in their ass… don’t do that and forget google, just seek real help.

Special thanks to Jay Miller’s Lucky Pierr, who preformed some improv last night at The Full Cup (on the last tuesdays of every month) for the inspiration for this post. PS. Non-human I’d fuck? Mystique.


Blow Jobs and Cancer: A Subtle Link

Historically the incidence of “Head and Neck” cancers has been linked to the use of tobacco and alcohol but more recently a new link has been identified. In the past several years many studies have identified a new risk factor as the use of tobacco has decreased but the incidence of these cancers hasn’t, oral sex.

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Justin Says: HPV and You!

HPV and you! Part 2 in a series of….well, a lot.

Over the past few years, and if you did not live under a rock, you have probably heard a lot about HPV – the Human Papillomavirus. HPV can cause all kinds of issues including sterility and cancer, especially in women. The American Social Health Association reported estimates that about 75-80% of sexually active Americans will be infected with HPV at some point in their lifetime.

In fact, if you’re hanging around a group of 10 women ages 20 – 24, it’s a good chance that 3 of them have HPV. Just imagine a very large Sorority house – oh god it’s likely HPV is everywhere!! All joking aside, let’s take a look at this chart:

But wait! I heard that you can now get a vaccine called Gardasil or Cervxil that prevents girls from getting HPV?” Yes, you can. “The U.S. Food and Drug Administration (FDA) recommends vaccination before adolescence and potential sexual activity” I won’t get into the debate on whether Big Pharma scared everyone into pushing their tweens to get this vaccine or the debate that if you force your adolescent to get this vaccine they should know what it’s for and what it prevents. (Ex: Mommy and Daddy think you’re potential slut material, so we are taking you to the doctor to get you protected but aren’t telling you why.) Of course I generalize greatly with that statement as some parents did use this as an opportunity to talk to their spawn about sex and STDs. Good on those guys. In my personal experience I find that many mom’s take their daughters for the vaccine because the mom already has HPV. So onto chart numero dos:

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Vibrators, Empowerment, and Psychiatric disease: The Birth of the Home Vibrator

Ever wonder how that electric friend that buzzes came to be in your hands? Your vibrator actually used to be a treatment tool for psychiatric illness.

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Justin Says: Chlamydia and You!

Chlamydia and you!

In an effort to better educate about the dangers of not knowing if your partner has a healthy crotch, I will be doing my best to put out a series of articles from the new 2009 STD CDC Surveillance Report. If you have a school project or a vested interest in the sexual health of others, you should definitely check out the link.  Oh and don’t worry it’s not all bad news – we’ve actually had some STD rates go down!

First up we will look at Chlamydia. According to ; “Chlamydia is a common sexually transmitted disease caused by the bacterium, Chlamydia trachomatis, which can damage a woman’s reproductive organs. Even though symptoms of Chlamydia are usually mild or absent, serious complications that cause irreversible damage, including infertility, can occur “silently” before a woman ever recognizes a problem.” That definition is good enough for me. First let’s check and make sure Chlamydia is still a problem: (Only pay attention to the dotted blue line for now)

Alright, so now we know the rates are going up…next up, let’s take a look at where in the U.S. Chlamydia is hitting the hardest: (The darker the blue, the more Chlamydia in that area)

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I Like a Good Flogging, What’s Wrong With Me?

Hey there everyone out in blogger land, I’m Dr.Slick. I joined the Jane Blow all star team of writers after reading and becoming a fan of not only the writing but the idea behind a collaborative effort of sex positive people opening up and answering questions for those in search of kinky enlightenment. I’m not really a doctor, yet. I’m a second year medical student from NYC. I encourage anyone who has a medically related question about sex to send me an email or twitter comment and I’ll do my best to answer it here.

Now for my first topic I decided to pick a common question, but one not many people have the courage to ask their doctor due to shame and embarrassment. “Does being a sadist or masochist mean something is mentally wrong with me?”

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Justin Says: You Can’t Cheat Death or the Tax-man, But You Can Cheat STDs… Here’s How!

About once a month I tend to get a phone call around 2 am from friends. In every case but one so far, it’s been similar to the following script: “OHMYGODJUSTINIAMFREAKINGOUT!!1!!11!! I think I might have done something with someone who had something.” First I try to calm the person down, and find out why they think they just got a STD…and I quote…“Because after we had sex he/she told me they had somethin’ somethin‘ bad. ..”

That’s  a good reason to freak out. I know only one person who is enough of a douche bag to actually kid about giving someone an STD, most people don’t screw around with others like that so it’s usually safe to assume the sexual partner is telling the truth. Without delving too much into the psychosocial aspects, a partner will tell you after a sexual experience because the guilt weighs heavy – and people in general do care about the well being of others, more so if it’s a partner they want to see again and continue to be intimate with.

Of course there are plenty of caveats to my above statement – a one night stand-fling won’t really give a shit, but people are more cautious with that type of thing. A hooker isn’t going to tell you about her rotten crotch and then there’s the people who are just fucksticks and have no idea about maintaining a positive sexual health and are swimming in a sea of ignorance and most likely crabs.

Let’s pretend you are in a situation where you have been exposed to something rather nasty, and you are freaking out calling the Sexpert team at 2 am in the morning. Don’t lose hope! There are some immediate prevention methods you can do to lower your risk of acquiring the STD you were exposed to.

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Jane Says: America Refuses to Look in the Mirror

I don’t know if you Dancing with the Stars fans are aware of -the chopped to shit and then cut altogether- advertisement that was for Lane Bryant’s plus size lingerie that was supposed to air the other night… but believe it or not, it happened.

Yep, ABC reportedly wouldn’t show it because there was too much “cleavage”.  CLEAVAGE.  The same station that puts out the shows Desperate Housewives, Grey’s Anatomy, Wife Swap and runs Victora Secret’s, McDonalds, the latest “get thin” pill advertisements is saying “too much” cleavage.

So it is ok to pump us images of Big Macs and Eva Langoria in her panties but a plus size model is just TOO MUCH for America… the fattest nation in the world.

I am sick and tired of these waif models in Cosmo or Vogue magazine telling (showing) me what the ONLY model of beauty is. On the other side of the coin I’m not sticking up for Fat America either.  I applaud companies who use real looking people for their commercials at least they are trying to keep it real.  I also applaud better living advocates like Jamie Oliver (coincidentally another show on the ABC network).

Airing a Victora’s Secret commercial back to back with our youth stuffing their faces with a McDonalds.

Airing Dove commercials with all body shapes and ethnics and then showing Axe commercials with the “thin, hipster, emo, club girl” body image (both made by the same company!)


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